LEST WE FORGET
By:
Kenda
An Emergency, Touched By An Angel
crossover story, though the emphasis is on the characters from Emergency.
Lest We Forget is dedicated to my
readers. Your input regarding what
elements you enjoy most in a fan fic story provides continuous inspiration.
Lest
We Forget
They
shall not grow old, as we that are left grow old
Age
shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the
going down of the sun, and in the morning,
We
will remember them.
Amen.*
*Lest We Forget - a sonnet written
during the first World War and often recited at funerals of war veterans.
The
woman sat curled in a corner of her couch with a box of Kleenex in her
lap. Tissues soiled by tears and mucus
were crumpled into balls and piled on the end table at her left elbow. The volume on the TV was so low she could
barely hear the reporter’s voice. Not
that it mattered. The pictures that had
been broadcast all day told the story.
It was April 30th, 1975, and Saigon was falling to the North
Vietnamese.
“Why
the hell am I sitting here crying?” the woman asked the empty room as she wiped
at fresh tears. “What the hell is wrong
with me lately? All I want to do is cry,
dammit.”
Unseen
by the home’s owner were the two women sitting at the dining room table. The house was an old but stately bungalow
with a wide front porch. A wicker settee accompanied by two wicker rocking
chairs made the porch an inviting place to relax. The rooms within the house were spacious and airy, possessing
ten-foot high ceilings. The living and
dining areas formed one big room separated only by an archway trimmed with the
type of elaborately carved woodworking that hadn’t been used in more than fifty
years now. The kitchen, with its maple
cabinets, maple drop-leaf table, and sky-blue Priscilla curtains hanging neatly
at all three windows, was behind the dining room. The arched hallway that ran behind the living room housed two
large bedrooms and a bathroom. Tucked
away at the rear of the house was a laundry room that had at one time been a
back porch.
“Her
language is a bit on the foul side, Tess.”
“Yes,
Angel Girl, it is. But you must forgive
her for that slip of the tongue. She’s
a veteran of the United States Army, she is.”
“Ah,
I see,” Monica nodded. “Yes, those who
have served this beautiful country are prone to rough language now and again as
I have come to learn.”
“Yes,
they are. But don’t let that fool you,
baby. This gal is nothing but a lady.”
“She’s
so sad, Tess,” Monica observed as the woman plucked another Kleenex from the
box. “And she seems confused. As if she doesn’t know why she’s crying.”
“She
doesn’t.”
“But
how can someone hurt this badly and not know why?”
“Years
of denial.”
“Pardon
me?”
“Years
of denial, Angel Girl. This woman is a
veteran of the Korean War. She was just
twenty years old when she first signed up to serve. Not much more than a child
really. She witnessed so many things
that broke her heart. But she was a
nurse. It was her job to be strong for
everyone else. It still is. So, over the years, she’s learned to hide
her pain. But on some days that pain is
too much for her to bear. Like today.”
“Because
of what’s happening in Vietnam,” Monica guessed, as she caught sight of the
helicopter taking off from the roof of the United States embassy as played out
on the color console television set.
“That’s
right. There have been so many things
about this war that remind her of the war she served in. Though she might not know it, today she’s
crying because she’s certain everyone will forget.”
“Forget
what?”
“The
war. The men and women who have fought
so hard for so many years now. The men and
women who have lost their lives during what has turned out to be an unpopular
campaign. Do you know what they call
the conflict she served in?”
“No. What?”
“The
Forgotten War. And that’s how she feels
today. Forgotten. Forgotten, unappreciated, and unneeded.”
“But
every human being needs to feel needed.
Pardon me for the poor sentence structure, but it’s so true, Tess.”
“You’re
right, baby, it is.”
“So
that’s our job here? To make her feel
needed again?”
“Oh,
no, Angel Girl. We can’t do that. Only she can find that feeling within
herself.”
“Then
what is our job? How are we supposed to
help her?”
“We’re
not.”
“But
she’s crying, Tess. We have to help her.”
Tess
reached out a pudgy hand and patted Monica on the arm. “You have such a kind heart, Angel
Girl. You remind me of someone else
we’re going to meet on this assignment.”
“Someone
else?”
“A
young man by the name of John Gage.”
“John
Gage,” Monica repeated with a thoughtful expression. “John Gage. Isn’t he the
one Andrew’s always being put on stand-by for?”
“That’s
right,” the Angel Of Death said as he stepped from the kitchen to join his
colleagues. “He’s the one.”
“So
are you finally going to get to take Mr. Gage home to Heaven, Andrew?”
“I
don’t know, Monica. Every time I assume
that’s God’s plan things change. Mr.
Gage appears to be very needed here on Earth.”
“Well,
that’s good. At least that means he’s
not sitting alone in his home crying.”
“No,
he’s not,” Tess agreed. “But then John Gage
doesn’t sit for very long on any given day.”
“Ah,”
Monica nodded, “he’s busy.”
“Always,
Angel Girl, even if that term just means flitting from place to place. He’s a young man with boundless energy and
an enthusiasm for life that outshines the morning sun.”
“Is
he in Vietnam?”
“No. He’s right here in Los Angeles. He’s a fireman. A fireman and a paramedic.”
“Oh,
how exciting. I’ve always wanted to
drive a fire truck. Will I have my own
helmet and turn out coat? Maybe a big
pair of those rubber goulashes firemen wear when they go to a fire? Will I be able to pull out an inch and a
half? Or cook chili for the guys when
we get back to the station after putting out a big blaze?”
“Now
you just stop talkin’ nonsense. No,
you’re not gettin’ no helmet or rubber goulashes. And you most certainly will not be driving a fire
truck. You’ll be working at Rampart
General Hospital.”
Monica
smiled. “Doctor Monica. I like the sound of that.”
“You
ain’t gonna be no doctor, either, so you just get that idea right on outta your
head, too.”
“But
if I’m not going to be a firefighter, or a doctor, what am I going to
be?”
“That
depends on Mr. Gage. And her.”
Monica’s
eyes went back to the weeping woman in the living room. “Why?”
“Because
John Gage has to live long enough for you to be part of this assignment.”
Monica
looked at Andrew who was still standing in the doorway between the dining room
and kitchen. The Angel Of Death
shrugged his shoulders.
“You
know as well as I do that sometimes the only thing that keeps humans from
crossing into our world is their will to live,” Tess said. “Or their will to
die.”
“But
Mr. Gage has always been such a strong young man in the past. He’s always had a
fierce will to live.”
“Yes,
he has, Monica,” Tess agreed. “But this
time he’s going to need some help finding that will.”
“Finding
it from where?”
“From
her.”
Monica
made a skeptical face. “If you’ll
pardon me for saying this, Tess, she doesn’t appear to be in any condition to
help even herself at the moment. Let
alone anyone else.”
“That’s
true, Angel Girl. But don’t you
see? That’s part of God’s plan.”
“His
plan?”
“Yes. In order to help themselves, John Gage and
Dixie McCall must first help one another.”
Monica
looked at Andrew who nodded his confirmation to Tess’s words.
“But
what if they don’t? Help each other
that is?”
Tess
heaved a sad sigh. “Then John Gage will die long before his time on this Earth
is due to come to an end. And while
she’ll still live on in body, Dixie McCall’s spirit will die, too.”
“It
could all end so sad then.”
“Yes,
Angel Girl, it could,” Tess said, as she listened to the lonely sound of the
woman’s sobs as they echoed off the high ceilings. “It could all end very sad.”
John
Gage paid little attention to the massive amount of news coverage given to the
fall of Saigon. He’d left Los Angeles
right after a gathering at the DeSoto home for Jennifer’s sixth birthday on
April 29th. He headed for the mountains
to hike and camp on his day off. Well,
to hike, camp, and push aside memories as he’d been doing for so many years
now. His wife Kim, and fourteen-month-old
daughter Jessie, had been murdered on April 28th, of 1967. Johnny had come to Los Angeles in January of
‘68 for a fresh start. No one here was
aware of the heartache he’d left behind in Montana. Not even Roy. Johnny had
no intention of that changing. Eight
years had now passed since Kim and Jessie’s deaths. Eight years in which Johnny had built a new life for himself
while trying to forget the past.
Johnny
would be the first to admit he never gave much thought to the war. Yes, he had
opinions like everyone else in the country seemed to, but mostly he’d kept them
to himself. He didn’t understand why
the leaders within the United States government never seemed to give the war
their best efforts. There was no doubt
that U.S. technology could have blown Vietnam right off the map if need
be. Why the politicians had let this
war go on for so long was beyond Johnny’s comprehension. Yet if he’d been called to serve he would
have. He’d been released from draft
status for Vietnam twice. The first
time was back in the summer of 1966.
He’d been exempt because he was an only son and an employee on his
father’s ranch. The agriculture
industry provided a great value to the United States during times of war. It
wasn’t unusual for young farmers or ranchers not to be called into the service
of their country, especially if there were no other male siblings in the family
to stay behind and work. The second
time Johnny had been passed over, the fall of 1970, was because he was a Los
Angeles County fireman, and therefore considered ‘necessary personnel’
stateside. Or at least that’s the way
the draft board worded it on his deferment.
Johnny knew Roy had served a year in ‘Nam back in ‘65, but they rarely
discussed it. The only thing Roy had
told Johnny was that he was one of the lucky ones. Johnny took that to mean Roy saw little action, which would make
sense since Roy wasn’t part of an infantry unit, but rather worked on a base as
both a mechanic and radio operator.
It
had been a week since the fall of Saigon, and the guys at the station were
still talking about it. Roy had been
the only one amongst them to serve in Vietnam.
Hank Stanley had been drafted several years before the build up of
military personnel in Vietnam and remained stateside throughout his two years
in the service. Mike Stoker had joined
the Navy right out of high school, and while he was aboard a ship that brought
supplies to other ships off the coast of Vietnam, he was never involved in any
fighting, nor had he ever stepped foot on Vietnamese soil.
Chet
and Marco had fallen into the same category as Johnny. Their employment with the fire department
had provided them deferments.
Nonetheless, it was a hot topic with everyone right now. Or at least with everyone other than
Johnny. Because of his deceased wife
and child he sometimes felt old beyond his years. Not that he ever showed those feelings. He’d become so good at hiding them even Johnny himself had a hard
time digging deep enough to find them.
That wasn’t to say Johnny didn’t understand the significance of the war
the United States had just lost, it was just that it didn’t directly touch his
life. If any of his friends back in
Montana, friends he hadn’t spoken to in seven years, had served in the war, or
even died over there, Johnny was unaware of it. And none of Johnny’s friends here in Los Angeles had seen battle
over there, so it wasn’t a subject the paramedic had reason to bring up.
“So,
Gage, what do you think?”
Johnny
continued washing the lunch dishes, totally unaware of the question he’d just
been asked.
“Hey,
Gage? You deaf or something?”
Johnny
turned around when a balled up napkin bounced off his skull.
“Chet,
knock it off.”
“I
asked you a question.”
“What
question?”
“What
do you think?”
“Think
about what?”
Chet
rolled his eyes at his co-workers. Everyone
but Roy was still seated at the table.
The senior paramedic was drying dishes for his partner and returning
them to their proper cabinets.
“About
‘Nam. The end of the war. The fall of Saigon. The whole nine yards.”
“I
don’t think anything about it.”
“You’re
kidding me, right?”
“No. I’m not kidding you.”
“You
mean to tell me John Gage doesn’t have an opinion he’d like to share on this
topic?”
Johnny
shrugged as he turned back to his soapy dish water. “No, Chet, I don’t have an opinion.”
“Oh,
come on, Gage. I’m not buying
that. Everyone has an opinion on
Vietnam.”
“All
right,” Johnny said as he drained the water from the sink. “If only to get you to shut up I’ll give you
my opinion. There was no reason we
couldn’t have won the war. I mean,
we’re the wealthiest nation in the world fighting a country barely larger than
the state of Rhode Island and yet we lose.
What sense does that make? Over
fifty thousand men and women lost their lives over there and for what? Nothing.
Absolutely nothing. What a total
waste.”
No
one disagreed with Johnny on that point.
The paramedic shook his head with both sorrow and disgust as he wiped
his wet hands on a dishtowel, then returned the towel to the rack.
“Most
of those kids who died weren’t over twenty years old. Twenty years old. When
you’re that age you think you’ve already lived a long life and are wise beyond
your years. But you haven’t. And it’s young. It’s just so damn young to have everything taken from you.”
The
men watched as Johnny walked out the back door. As soon as Roy heard the basketball start to bounce against the
parking lot’s pavement he knew Chet had struck a nerve with Johnny. Chet knew it, too.
“What?” The Irishman asked of the four pair of eyes
staring at him. “What did I say?”
Funny
thing was, no one could answer Chet this time, or blame him for any
wrongdoing. If what he had said upset
Johnny it was far beyond the ability of any man present to figure out why.
Hank
Stanley did what any good leader does at this point. He clapped his hands together as he stood to head to his office.
“Okay,
guys, enough on this subject for today.
It will be wise for all of us to remember this will be a sensitive topic
for many people we encounter in the weeks and months ahead. Let’s just drop it around the station for
the time being.”
After
Hank’s office door closed Chet turned to Roy.
“But
what did I say to get Johnny so narked off?”
“I
don’t think he’s narked off, Chet. Just
upset. With Johnny’s there’s a big
difference.”
“All
right. So what did I say to get him
upset?”
Roy
shrugged. “I honestly don’t know.”
“He
doesn’t have a brother who’s served over there, does he?” Chet asked, fearing
that maybe Johnny had lost someone he loved to the war.
“Not
that I’m aware of. But to tell you the
truth I don’t know much about his family.”
“You
don’t even know if Gage has a brother or not?”
“Nope.”
“You’re
shittin’ me.”
“No,
I’m not. I know his mother died a few months
before he moved out here in January of ‘68.
I know his father is still living, and every so often he speaks of his
paternal grandfather. But other than
that Johnny doesn’t mention his past.”
“Weird.”
“What’s
so weird about it?” Mike asked.
“Mike,
come on. Roy and Johnny are best
friends. They’ve been partners for over
three years now. Don’t you think it’s
odd that Roy doesn’t know more about Johnny’s home life in Montana than what
he’s just told us? I mean geez, Gage
yaks on at the mouth about everything else.
A guy would think Roy would even know the name of Johnny’s kindergarten
teacher.”
“Mrs.
Long Feather.”
“Huh?”
“The
name of Johnny’s kindergarten teacher,” Roy said. “Mrs. Long Feather. He went to grade school on an Indian
Reservation.”
“So
you know the name of Gage’s kindergarten teacher, but you don’t know if he has
a brother. See what I’m saying
here? Weird. Just plain weird.”
“Chet,
some things are private,” Marco pointed out.
“Even for someone as outgoing as Johnny. All of us have parts of our lives we’d rather not reveal, or that
are too painful to talk about.”
“No
way. I tell you guys everything.”
Roy
just shook his head at the Irishman while Marco and Mike exchanged
longsuffering smiles.
Chet’s
voice dropped, and his eyes darted around the room as though he was expecting a
figure of authority to walk in at any moment.
“You
don’t suppose Johnny’s running from the law, do you?”
“Chet,
come on,” Marco scoffed. “You’re being
ridiculous now.”
“No,
I’m not. Give it some thought here,
guys. What kind of Indian name is John
Roderick Gage anyway? Maybe that’s the
name Johnny took after he--”
“After
he what?” Roy asked. He was trying not to show it, but he was
getting a little miffed at Chet.
“I
don’t know. After he did something that
caused him to change his name and leave Montana.”
Roy
leaned back against the counter with his arms folded across his chest. He tried
to keep the glare he was shooting Chet to minimum intensity.
“Chet,
if only to shut you up I’ll tell you what I know about Johnny. Number one; the United States Government
forced Indians to take English names when they put them on reservations. This extends to the names they give their
children. Or at least the legal
names. Number two; he spent part of his
growing up years on a reservation, and part of them on a ranch his parents bought
when he was a kid. He came to LA to
work as a fireman because there weren’t many job opportunities for a ‘half
breed,’ as Johnny put it, in the small town of White Rock, Montana. End of story.”
“And
does he ever go back?”
“To
Montana?”
“Yeah.”
“I
don’t know. Not that he mentions.”
“And
no one from his family ever visits him here.
So see, something’s up.”
“How
did we get to this from Vietnam?” Roy asked.
“I’m
just curious, that’s all.”
“Well,
keep in mind curiosity killed the cat.”
“But--”
“Let
it go, Chet,” Roy advised. “Look, you
guys know my dad died when I was thirteen, right?”
“Yeah.”
“But
it’s not something I talk about much, is it?”
“No.”
“And
you never bug me about that fact, Chet, so extend that same respect to
Johnny. I don’t know why our
discussion about ‘Nam upset him and I don’t care. If he wants to tell me he will. If he doesn’t, then so be it.”
“But
I don’t think it was the discussion about ‘Nam that set him off in the first
place,” Chet said. “I think it was
something else. Only I can’t figure
out--”
Roy
grabbed a dishtowel and stuffed it in Chet’s mouth as he passed by.
“Chet,
for once and for all, shut up.”
To
the sound of Mike and Marco’s laughter Roy headed for the locker room. He had a
book in his duffel bag he wouldn’t mind reading if the afternoon stayed
quiet. Before he got that far the
klaxons went off and the squad was called into service. As Roy slipped behind the wheel a slightly
winded Johnny jumped in the passenger side.
Roy took the sheet of paper Cap handed him and passed it to his
partner. Johnny checked the map book
and navigated as Roy drove. Right
before they got to the school where a child had fallen from the monkey bars,
Roy looked at his partner.
“Do
you have a brother?”
Considering
the two men hadn’t even been carrying on a conversation the question caught
Johnny off guard.
“What?”
Roy
felt his face turning red. He had just
stooped to Chet’s level, something he could have never imagined himself doing.
“Never
mind.”
“No.
What’d you ask me?”
“It’s
not important.”
“I
didn’t hear you. Ask me again.”
Roy
gave an internal sigh, hoping he wouldn’t regret this question given Johnny’s
earlier unexplained upset. “I asked
if you have a brother.”
“No. Why?”
“Neither
do I,” Roy replied for lack of knowing what else to say.
Well,
Chet, that disproves your theory that Johnny has a brother who served in ‘Nam.
Johnny
shot his partner a look that said he was certain Roy had lost his mind.
“I
know you don’t. So what’s going
on? Are you thinking of adopting one?”
“No,”
Roy laughed, before growing serious. “I
guess you’re the closest I come to having a brother. I mean, I think of you like a brother, you know?”
Johnny
made a dramatic showing of smashing his body against the passenger side door as
though he suddenly found it necessary to get as far away from Roy as
possible. He cocked an eyebrow at his
partner.
“Are
you feeling all right?”
“I’m
fine. Why?”
“You
just don’t normally go around saying stuff like that. Don’t tell me Joanne has made you join one of those groups where
you get in touch with your feelings and junk like that.”
“No,
nothing like that.”
“Then
why the sudden sentiment?”
Damn
you, Chet.
“Just forget I said anything.”
“But--”
“Forget
it, Johnny.”
“All
right.”
Nothing
more was said until the men pulled into the school yard. As they were opening compartment doors to
get their equipment Johnny tossed his partner a teasing grin.
“Hey,
Roy?”
“Yeah?”
“If
I was gonna adopt me a blue eyed, blond headed brother, you’d be the paleface
I’d choose.”
“Very
funny.”
And
with that the two men jogged to the fallen child with the broken arm, their
conversation forgotten for the moment.
With
each year that passed since Kim and Jessie’s murders, the internal mourning
period Johnny went through at the end of every April seemed to lessen in
length. That used to upset the paramedic,
but over time he’d come to realize that was normal. Normal, and overall a lot easier on his emotional health. He knew that didn’t mean he’d ever forget
his wife and little girl, or ever stop loving them, but it simply meant he was
still amongst the living and had to carry on.
By the time mid-May arrived Johnny was
once again his old self. The same could
not be said for Dixie McCall.
The
urge to cry whenever she was alone had not left the nurse. And alone was how Dixie spent most of her
time when she wasn’t on duty at Rampart.
Unbeknownst to Dixie’s friends and colleagues, she was rarely leaving
her house these days other than when forced to make the trip to work, or go to
the grocery store. She was tossing out
excuses left and right each time an invitation was issued for dinner, or a
movie, or a Sunday afternoon of tennis with a trio of her female
co-workers. She no longer rode her bike
around her quiet neighborhood on a daily basis, and she’d lost interest in the
Candy Striper program at the hospital that she’d so faithfully been the head of
for years now. She’d taken the program
beyond what it had been; a volunteer position for teenagers who delivered
gifts, flowers, and newspapers to patients, or who played with the children on
the Pediatrics Ward, to instead introduce these young people to the world of
nursing in a way that turned many of them on to the idea of making the
profession their life long careers.
Dixie had always been so proud of that, and had always enjoyed working
with the teens, but lately she’d given more and more of those responsibilities
to another ER nurse.
Like
many people who are overwhelmed by depression, Dixie recognized the symptoms
but didn’t completely understand the cause.
When she gave it any thought at all she supposed there were a lot of
reasons why she didn’t want to get up and face each day. Certainly the end of the Vietnam War was at
least a part of it. The men and women
who served over there were arriving home, but to what? Not a nation that was honoring them, that’s
for certain. Not anymore than it had
honored her and the other veterans of Korea; and by what Dixie was seeing on
the news, even less.
This
country loves a winner, but heaven forbid you should end up fighting on the
losing side.
Dixie
sighed as she slipped into her seat at the nurse’s station. She’d been staring at next week’s schedule
all day now, and hadn’t gotten any farther on it than Sunday. Each time she found a moment to study it she
was called away. Though not called away
for a patient in crisis, but rather called away because a treatment room wasn’t
set up the way Doctor Brackett liked it.
Or because her newest nurse, a young lady fresh from college and barely
twenty-one years old, was in the bathroom crying because Doctor Morton spoke
sharply to her. Or because someone lost
the lab tests Doctor Early had ordered.
Or because an orderly hadn’t cleaned up the vomit in Treatment Room Five.
Or because a waiting family member kept interrupting her to check on a patient. Dixie stared at the black squares on the
paper in front of her.
I’m
making the highest income now than I have ever earned in my life, yet every day
I dislike my job more and more. I
feel like an adult baby-sitter. If I’m
not tending to Kel and his quirks about the set up of a treatment room, then
I’ve got someone crying on my shoulder - literally - because Mike Morton
brought his ill temper to work. And if
it’s not that, then someone is complaining about having to wait to see a
doctor, or I’m washing dirty coffee cups left behind by all the paramedics who
breeze in and out of this place on a daily basis as though it’s Dixie’s
Diner. I don’t know when I got so out
of touch with hands-on-nursing. Trauma
care is what I do best, but it’s what I’ve gotten to do the least of these last
few years. If wanted to nurture
everyone through life I’d have become a kindergarten teacher, which is what I
feel like on most days.
Dixie pushed her dark thoughts
away. It was already Friday. She had to get this schedule done before she
went off-duty at three o’clock or she’d be taking it home with her. And she knew how little success she had at
accomplishing anything at home lately if it didn’t involve a box of Kleenex Tissues.
I’ll
probably just end up having another good cry as soon as I walk in the damn
door.
Dixie paid little attention to the
nurses looking over her shoulders. When
she finally put her mind on the schedule she could complete it with a high
school band playing John Philip Sousa marches in the waiting area.
Betty
looked from the schedule to her co-workers.
Dixie’s mood had been so foul lately they hated to approach her. Betty finally took a deep breath and plunged
into uncertain waters.
“Uh,
Dix, I. . .remember I told you that I need Sunday off?”
“Yes,
and I said I need to come in an hour later,” a nurse by the name of Ann timidly
reminded. “I’ll work an hour later, of
course, to make up for it, but my son is serving seven o’clock mass that
morning and I’d really like to be there to see him.”
“And
I need Monday off,” Carol reminded. “My
sister’s flying in from Dallas on Sunday evening so I’d like some time with--”
“I
need, I need, I need!” Dixie
groused. “Don’t you ever stop and think
how tired I get of hearing that phrase?
For God’s sake I’m not your mother!
And don’t you three have something better to do than stand over my
shoulder while I’m working?”
The
women scattered like mice. Each one of
them had an enormous amount of respect for Dixie and, until recently, had loved
working for her. Now they couldn’t
figure out what had caused the sudden change in her personality. Betty had tried to talk to her about it one
day, but had been told point blank it was none of her business. Later, Dixie felt bad about the hurt she’d
seen in Betty’s eyes, but never had apologized for being the cause of it.
I
suppose they’re gathered in a corner somewhere right now talking about what a
bitch I am. Well, so be it. I’d gladly trade places with any one of
them. After a week of this job they’d
be just as crabby as I am, and at least I’d be able to do what I’m good at,
trauma care nursing.
Dixie didn’t even have a smile or a
hello for one of her favorite paramedics that afternoon. Johnny simply shrugged his shoulders when
the nurse made no reply to his greeting.
He assumed she was engrossed in her work and hadn’t heard him. He poured himself a cup of coffee and leaned
against the counter behind Dixie whistling between sips. Roy was in a treatment room with the patient
they’d brought in. Johnny’s assistance
wasn’t needed, so he figured he’d say hi to Dix and grab a cup of coffee while
he waited.
Johnny
had a natural interest in people and what was going on around him, so didn’t
notice Dixie’s silence as he watched the bustling activity within the ER. Three minutes into Johnny’s visit Dixie
slammed a fist on the counter.
“Do
you have to do that?”
“Do
what?”
“Whistle.”
“Oh. Sorry.
I didn’t know it was bothering you.”
Dixie
swiveled on her stool and faced the paramedic.
“Well, it does bother me. It’s
bothered me for years. You can’t carry a tune to save your soul. Or to save mine. So just knock it off, okay?”
“O.
. .okay.”
“And
make sure you wash your coffee cup when you’re finished. You guys seem to think this is Dixie’s Diner
and that I have nothing better to do than pick up after you. And make sure you spread the word to your
fellow paramedics, too.”
Johnny’s
“All right,” was spoken like he was walking on a bed of nails. He let a moment
pass, then shot the woman a grin that never failed to soothe her feathers no
matter how ruffled they might be.
“What’s the matter, Dix? Get up
on the wrong side of the bed this morning?”
“No,
I did not get up on the wrong side of the bed.
And quit calling me that. I hate it.
I always have.”
“Calling
you what?”
“Dix. My name is Dixie if you haven’t noticed.”
“I
noticed. I just didn’t know it bothered you.
Sor--”
“Don’t
be sorry. Everyone is sorry. I’m sick of hearing it.”
Poor
Johnny didn’t know what to say. So far
everything that had come out of his mouth where Dixie was concerned had been
wrong. He settled on keeping quiet for
the moment while she returned to her schedule.
It wasn’t until an attractive woman with long auburn hair walked by the
nurse’s station and smiled at him that Johnny broke the silence.
“Who
was she?”
“Who
was who?”
“The
woman that just walked by here. The one
with the gorgeous red hair.”
Dixie
looked up to see a young woman entering the elevator.
“Oh,
her. A student chaplain. Monica somebody or the other.”
“That’s
an odd last name.”
“What?”
“Somebody
or the other. It’s an odd last name.”
Dixie
didn’t laugh like Johnny expected her to.
Instead she shot a glare over her shoulder. “Listen, if she’s going to be your latest conquest then you
find out her last name.”
“What
do you mean by that?”
“You
know perfectly well what I mean. Whomever
you latch onto today you’ll forget about tomorrow. You think women have no feelings. You think you can use them for your own amusement then toss them
aside when you tire of them. Well, you
can’t, Johnny. You hurt a lot of people
that way. It’s about time you grew up
and faced that fact.”
Now
it was Johnny who was hurt. It was none
of Dixie’s business what type of a relationship he carried on with any woman he
dated. Not since Kim had he ever led a
woman to believe he was going to make a life long commitment to her. He’d never do that until the day he was
ready to marry again, and so far that day hadn’t come. Sometimes he wondered if it ever would. But regardless, despite the many women he’d
dated since coming to L.A., he’d never sweet-talked any of them into doing
anything under false pretenses. If
someone had told Dixie otherwise then they were lying. Johnny thought Dixie knew him well enough to
instinctively understand that, but evidently not. Before their conversation could go any further, and Johnny was
just mad enough and hurt enough to take it farther, Dixie was called away. She brushed by the paramedic without so much
as a glance in his direction.
When
Dixie returned to the nurse’s station twenty minutes later Johnny was
gone. Every dirty cup had been washed,
dried, and was neatly stacked on the cart that held the coffee maker. The nurse shot a small smile at the
housekeeping staff member she didn’t recognize who was wiping off the back
counter with a damp sponge.
Must
be another new one. At least she
appears to have ambition.
“Thanks
for washing those cups.”
“Cups?” The large black woman questioned as she
turned from her work.
“The
coffee cups. The paramedics don’t know
the meaning of the phrase, ‘pick up after yourself please.’ ”
“Oh,
but I didn’t wash these here cups, Mizz McCall. Some nice young man with the
cutest ole’ grin washed ‘em. I tried to
do it for him. I told him it was my
job, but he said no, that he was doing it for Dix. Or at least he started to say Dix. He corrected himself and said Dixie. I take it that’s you?”
“Yes,”
Dixie acknowledged quietly, suddenly ashamed of her earlier behavior with
Johnny. “That’s me.”
“It
seemed important to him that he do something nice for you. I hope it’s okay that I didn’t help
him. I’m new ‘round here and don’t
wanna lose my job.”
“Don’t
worry, you won’t lose your job,” Dixie assured. “You said you’re new?”
“Yes,
Ma’am. This is my first day.”
“Oh.
In that case, welcome to Rampart. You
know who I am, but I didn’t catch your name.”
“Tess.”
“Hi,
Tess. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Nice
to meet you, too, Ma’am. This seems
like a real good place to work. That
young man. . .John, I think he said his name was?”
“Yes. John Gage.
Or Johnny as most of us call him.
He’s one of our paramedics. As a
matter of fact, he and his partner Roy DeSoto are probably the best paramedics
in this county. Though don’t tell
anyone I said that. You know how men
can be when they find out you think they’re pretty special.”
“Insufferable,”
Tess supplied.
“That’s
for sure. And, of course, I wouldn’t
want to hurt any of the others. They’re
all great guys.”
“You
didn’t seem to think they were so great a little while ago.”
“Pardon?”
Tess
returned to her task of wiping the counter top. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but my ears are big as a circus
elephant’s, as you might have noticed. Because of that, I couldn’t help but
hear you crabbin’ away at Mr. Gage from where I was sweepin’ up in the waiting
room. Bad day?”
“More
like a bad month.”
“Sorry
to hear that. Anything I can do to
help?”
Dixie
didn’t want to insult the woman, but couldn’t imagine anything a cleaning lady
could do to assist with bringing her out of her current mood.
“No. Like I said, just a bad month. I’m sure it will pass given time.”
“Could
be. Though time isn’t always the great
healer we think it is.”
“No?”
“No. First you have to face the problem before it
can even begin to be healed.”
Dixie
gave Tess what she hoped the woman would take as a distracted nod, then she
returned to her schedule. Her effort to
look busy didn’t deter Tess any.
“Now
as I started to say earlier, that young man –
Johnny. . .I think he’s worried about you.”
“Worried
about me?”
“He
didn’t say it in so many words, but I’m pretty good at readin’ people. I could tell that whatever went on between
the two of you really upset him.”
Dixie
tried to dismiss Tess’s words with a shrug of her shoulders.
“If you work here long enough, Tess,
there’s one thing you’ll learn about Johnny Gage.”
“And
what would that be?”
“He’s
a good actor. At the drop of a hat
he’ll turn those big brown eyes on any willing female, bat those long black
lashes of his, and feign the ‘poor little old me’ look with all the skill of an
Oscar winner. He loves the attention.”
“Maybe
he needs it.”
“Pardon?”
“The
attention. Maybe there’s a reason why
he needs attention from a woman such as yourself.”
“Yeah,
there’s a reason all right. Because
he’s got a big ego.”
“You
say that like you don’t really mean it. Like you want me to believe you don’t
hold much affection for Mr. Gage, while deep inside you know that’s not the
truth.”
How’s
she do that? I’m doing my best to get
rid of the woman, but it’s like she’s got a direct line to my thoughts.
“Today I mean it.”
“We
all need something from our friends, Mizz McCall. There ain’t nothin’ wrong with that. It’s what draws us to them in the first place, and it’s what
makes us human. Instead of scoffing at
it as though it don’t mean diddly squat, you should be pleased to know you
provide something to Mr. Gage that no one else does.”
“And
just what would that be?” Dixie asked as she attempted to return her attention
to the schedule again. “A mother
figure?”
“Would
there be anything wrong with that?”
“I’m
growing rather weary of being ‘mother’ to adult people.”
“His
is dead, you know.”
Dixie
glanced up from her schedule. “Pardon me?”
“John
Gage’s mother is deceased. If part of
what your friendship provides to him is memories of a dear woman he loved very
much, you shouldn’t complain about that.
You should be honored.”
Dixie
was dumbfounded. She knew very little
about Johnny’s background other than he grew up in Montana. She couldn’t imagine that this woman, who
was brand new to Rampart and couldn’t have had more than a five minute
conversation with Johnny, would have discovered something so important in such
a short amount of time.
“How
do you know that?”
“Know
what?”
“That
Johnny’s mother is deceased. Did he
tell you?”
“Land
sakes, no he didn’t tell me. As a
matter of fact, that’s one thing you and John Gage have in common, Mizz
McCall.”
“No,
we don’t. My mother is still living.”
“That’s
not what I was gonna say.”
“Then
what were you going to say?”
“Neither
of you like to talk about your pasts.
You both think that by denying the things that have caused you heartache
you can forget those things ever existed.
But one of these days soon you’ll need each other in ways neither of you
can imagine now. I just hope you both
realize that before it’s too late.”
Before
the stunned Dixie could form a reply Tess picked up her sponge and bucket and
loaded them on her cleaning cart.
“I’m
gonna set up Treatment Room One for Doctor Brackett. Lord help us all, but that man is particular. Why, he’ll be telling God how to rearrange
Heaven when his turn comes.”
Dixie
shook her head in wonder as Tess lumbered away. How the woman, after only one day of employment, was privy to the
knowledge she had was beyond Dixie’s ability to figure out. And as far as Tess’s prediction went of
Dixie and Johnny needing each other at some point in the future, well the nurse
chalked that up to just plain crazy talk.
Oh
well, she must be one of those nosy people who enjoys listening in on
conversations that are none of her business, then offering her two cents
worth. I hope personnel checked into
her background. I’m not so certain she
isn’t half nuts to begin with.
Tess popped back around the
corner. “Oh, and about your scheduling
problems?”
Dixie
took a deep, calming breath. She just
wanted this annoying woman to go away.
“Yes?”
“If
I was you, I’d give Ann off on Sunday and have Carol work. Then give Carol off on Monday and have Ann
work. That way you don’t have to juggle
Ann’s hours on Sunday, don’t have to be short staffed on Monday by giving Carol
off, and everyone is happy.”
Dixie
gave a slow nod. “Yes, that would do
it.”
Tess
smiled. “See how easy it is when you’re not letting anger cloud your thoughts?”
Dixie
was so shocked by the woman’s boldness she couldn’t make a reply.
“And
if I was you, baby, I’d think about apologizin’ to John Gage. True, he can’t carry a tune, and he does
have a tendency to leave his dirty coffee cups on your counter, and Lord knows
that man has an eye for a pretty face, but it’s not really him you were mad
at. It was yourself. Friendships are precious and need to be
nurtured, despite the fact that right now you don’t want to put much effort
into nurturing anyone.” Tess grabbed
the arm of the cart and started pushing again.
“But I talk too much, I know.
That’s my one fault. I’ll go get
that treatment room ready for Ole’ Doctor Picky.”
And with that Dixie was left alone with
her thoughts, and her schedule.
Shannon
Ten Clouds stared out the window as the Greyhound bus pulled out of LAX’s
parking lot. Shannon was a twenty-year
old Marine who had just arrived home from Vietnam. The bus was headed south, for Camp Pendleton, and filled with
young men like Shannon. Or at least
like Shannon in the sense that they were all fresh off a plane from ‘Nam. Shannon was the only American Indian amongst
the Marines on the bus, which was what set him apart from his comrades. Though
that issue didn’t matter much anymore. As a matter of fact it hadn’t really
mattered since he’d left the reservation in Arizona. If nothing else, the Marine Corps had given Shannon a sense of
belonging. Despite the thirteen months
of hell he’d just lived through in ‘Nam, he’d learned what it meant to belong
to a unit of men where the color of your skin, or the slant of your eyes, or
your last name didn’t matter. All that
mattered was that you proved your loyalty to your fellow Marines and your worth
to the Corps. Shannon had done that
over and over again in every bloody battle he fought. Not that prejudice didn’t exist in the Marine Corps, but for the
past year Shannon and the young men he fought along side were more concerned
with living one more day than they were concerned with bickering over their
differences; be those differences cultural, racial, or religious.
Though
the bus was filled with fifty young men the only sound that could be heard was
the roar of the Greyhound’s engine.
Shannon observed his comrades from his seat at the rear of the bus. The oldest amongst them was only twenty-two,
the youngest had turned nineteen the day Saigon fell. But to Shannon, they all looked like weary old men. He wondered if he looked that way, too. He wondered if there were dark circles of
fatigue under his eyes, tense lines around his mouth, and a blank look to his
face as though any emotions that had once made him smile, laugh, or lit his
eyes with joy, had been sucked out of him in Southeast Asia.
Despite
the early hour of the morning in which they’d landed, protesters had been
waiting for them at the airport. They’d
been shouted at, called baby killers, and then the ultimate insult; Shannon and
several others had been spit on. They’d
been warned to expect this type of welcome, but being warned versus actually
experiencing it were two different things.
Shannon remembered the stories his father had told of the hero’s welcome
he’d received when he’d returned from the South Pacific after World War II. His father, a full blooded Pima Indian, had
been hailed by his countrymen as opposed to being spit on by them. Of course, the hero’s welcome didn’t last
any longer than it took his dad to arrive back on the reservation, but despite
that, even thirty years later his father’s eyes still filled with tears of
gratitude each time he spoke of it.
Most
of the men sat two to a seat, but no conversation ensued as the bus traveled
the streets of L.A. Everyone stared out
the windows. Even the grimiest factory was something to marvel over as it
slowly sank in that you were back where you belonged. Back in the country of your birth. The land of opportunity.
And after seeing the living conditions in Vietnam, Shannon finally
believed that America was, indeed, the greatest country in the world,
regardless of the troubles that still plagued a member of a minority group such
as himself.
The
bus bounced beneath Shannon. He sat
alone, purposely isolating himself from the others. That hadn’t been difficult to do. He’d chosen the seat closest to the bathroom. Not a particularly sought after spot, but a
good one if you wanted to be able to stretch your legs while at the same time
having no desire for human contact. The
seat across from Shannon was empty. Or
at least he was certain it had been just moments earlier. Now a voice sounded from his right.
“How
are you doing?”
Shannon’s
head jerked with surprise. He turned,
wondering how the man had gotten to the seat without him being aware of any
movement on the bus. He finally chalked
it up to being both lost in thought, and absorbed by the passing scenery. Shannon gave the blond man a long look. He didn’t recall seeing him on the plane,
nor when they boarded the bus. The man’s hair fell far beyond Marine Corps
regulations, but yet he wore the stripes of a sergeant.
“I’m
fine, Sir.”
“Leave
the ‘Sir’ stuff in ‘Nam for now, private.”
The blond said. “I’m
Andrew.”
“Shannon,”
the young man responded in return.
Since Andrew didn’t supply his last name, Shannon didn’t offer his. After a while it got old listening to
people’s comments regarding the oddities of Shannon’s full name. Shannon Eric Ten Clouds did not sound nearly
as Native American as Shannon looked.
“Doing
some heavy thinking I see.”
Great. The guy wants to talk.
“Uh. . .yeah. I guess.” Shannon looked out the window. “It’s beautiful.”
Andrew’s
eyes followed the same path Shannon’s had taken. All he saw was smog, cars, brick buildings, and a set of railroad
tracks in the distance, as they chugged through an aging section of Los
Angeles.
“What’s
beautiful?”
“America.”
Andrew
nodded. “I know of only one place that holds more beauty. A beauty so magnificent, so joyous, that it
can’t be described with words.”
Shannon
tore his gaze from the window and looked at the man across the aisle.
“Where
would that be?”
“Heaven.”
“Heaven?”
“I’m
an angel.”
“An
angel?”
“Yes.”
“As
in someone who wears a white robe, has wings, and floats around on clouds all
day?”
“That’s
a common misconception. Most of the
time we look just like you. Like every
day, ordinary people.”
“Oh.”
Andrew
smiled at the young man’s skepticism.
“You’ll
see soon enough. Just remember, there’s
no need to be afraid.”
Shannon
resisted the urge to laugh. He’d been
afraid of a lot of things in the past year, but a nut who thought he was an
angel wasn’t one of them. He gave
Andrew a placating smile, then turned to stare out the window once more. As far as Shannon was concerned the guy was
two steps away from being locked in the loony bin. Shannon had met a few others like him. Veterans who had cracked under the stress of battle. No doubt he’d be drummed out of the Corps as
soon as the psychological evaluations at Camp Pendleton were finished.
Shannon
pushed all thoughts of the crazy sergeant from his mind. Instead, he focused on what he was going to
do now that the war was over. He knew,
at some point in the next few weeks, he’d be granted leave to visit his family
in Arizona. His parents and four
sisters had been faithful correspondents throughout this last year. He was looking forward to spending time with
them. When his leave was up he’d have
to decide if he was going to make the Marine Corps his career, or if there was
something else he was interested in doing.
Leaving the reservation had opened his eyes to the many possibilities
the world held. He didn’t think he
wanted to return there permanently.
Other than his family, the reservation had nothing to offer in terms of
a future for Shannon.
And
God knew, after this past year, the one thing Shannon Ten Clouds wanted was a
future. A bright, shining, future as is
the right of every American boy.
Johnny
was in love again. Or as ‘in love’ as
John Gage ever seemed to get. Her name was Eve Madison. Her blond hair was the color of sun bleached
wheat and fell in thick waves to her waist.
Her eyes were as blue as the summer sky, her nose straight and tiny, her
lips full and luscious. She stood five
feet ten inches tall, weighed one hundred and twelve slender pounds, and was a
fashion model with the shapeliest legs in Los Angeles.
And
Joanne DeSoto hated her.
Roy
pondered this as he sat at his kitchen table sipping coffee, trying to capture
the last few moments of morning serenity before the kids rushed off to school
and he headed for the station. Eve and
Johnny had been over for dinner the night before. Though Joanne never lost the ‘hostess demeanor’ she was famous
for, Roy could tell his wife disliked Eve within three minutes of meeting
her. The paramedic chuckled as he
recalled the dark looks Joanne had shot Eve behind her back that no one but him
had seen.
“What’s
so funny?” The subject of Roy’s thoughts
asked as she entered the kitchen. She’d
just finished making the beds and overseeing the kids getting dressed for
school. Chris was now in the bathroom
brushing his teeth, while Jennifer packed her book bag.
“I
was just sitting here thinking how often we say that the poor guy who marries
Jennifer will first have to pass her Uncle Johnny’s inspection.”
“That’s
true,” Joanne acknowledged. Though
Jennifer was only six years old, meaning marriage was many years in the future
yet, there was no doubt her intended would have a more difficult time getting
John Gage’s approval than he would getting Roy’s.
“And
in thinking about that,” Roy said, “I realized that Johnny’s future wife is
going to have a heck of time passing your inspection.”
“If
this is about Eve don’t even waste your breath.”
“What
have you got against Eve?”
“She’s
shallow, immature, and none too bright.”
“So
what makes her different from any other woman Johnny’s dated?”
“She’s
insincere.”
“What?”
“Insincere.”
“How
so?”
“I
don’t know,” Joanne said as she began loading the dishwasher. “If you’re asking
me to give you an example I can’t. I
only met her for the first time last night.”
“My
point exactly.”
“Look,
Roy, sometimes a woman can just sense these things.”
“What
things?”
“There’s
just something about her. . .I mean, she works in an industry where beauty and
physical perfection are very important, right?”
“Right.”
“I
just got the impression that she’s attracted to Johnny for the wrong reasons.”
“The
wrong reasons?”
“While
you, Johnny, and the kids were playing in the backyard Eve couldn’t keep her
eyes off him.”
“So? That’s a good thing, isn’t it?”
“No.”
“No?” Roy said, feeling every bit the part of idiot
male he was currently playing.
“Not
when all she could keep talking about was how handsome he is. How brown his eyes are. How dark and thick his hair is. What a nice body he has. How perfect he is. . .and by perfect she
meant physically perfect.”
“Did
she say that?”
“She
didn’t have to. I could read between
the lines.”
“Look,
Joanne, I think you’re making too much of this. You only just met the girl.
And besides, Johnny really likes her.
They’ve been seeing each other for close to three months now. If she is as shallow as you say he would
have broken it off with her.”
“Maybe. Maybe not.
Maybe she keeps her shallow side from him.”
“I
suppose that’s possible.”
“It’s
very possible.”
“Well,
whatever you do, don’t say anything to Johnny about it. I really think Eve might be the one.”
Joanne
almost dropped the dish she was putting in the rack. She turned to look at her husband.
“What
did you say?”
“That
she might be the one. The girl Johnny
finally settles down with.”
“It’s
that serious?”
“I
think so. He really likes her a lot.”
“How
do you know?”
“When
Johnny isn’t trying to figure out a way to dump a girl a week after he’s
started dating her, that means he’s in love.
Or at least I think so because I don’t ever recall him seeing anyone as
long as he’s been seeing Eve.”
“Oh,
Lord, help us.”
“What’s
that supposed to mean?”
“It
means that I always envisioned the woman Johnny marries and myself as growing
to be close friends. I could never, and
I do mean never, be close friends with Evil Knieva.”
“Joanne!” Roy voiced his amused astonishment at his
wife’s play on words. Joanne rarely had
a bad thought to utter about anyone.
“She’s
going to hurt him, Roy. Mark my words,
just when Johnny needs her the most she’s going to hurt him.”
“Since
when did you become psychic?”
“I’m
not psychic. It’s just this eerie
feeling I have.”
“Eerie
feeling? Like a premonition?”
“I
don’t know. Maybe it’s just that my
first impression of Eve was so negative I’m reading more into this than really
exists.”
“I’m
sure that’s it,” Roy agreed as he stood and crossed through the kitchen. He rinsed his coffee mug out in the sink
then put it in the dishwasher for his wife. “Trust Johnny on this one, Jo. If Eve really is like you say, he’ll figure
it out for himself.”
“I
just hope he figures it out before she hurts him in ways he won’t easily mend
from.”
“I
think you’re being a bit over dramatic here.”
“I
just wish Johnny would settle down in the suburbs with a nice girl, become a
daddy to about. . .oh, four children, and live a quiet life.”
Roy
laughed. “Johnny? Live a quiet life in the suburbs? Joanne, the suburbs would never be the same after
John Gage and his yet-to-be-born four kids invaded them. I don’t think suburban America is ready for
that.”
“Not
if he marries Eve it’s not.”
And
having gotten in the last word on that subject, Joanne walked away calling,
“Chris! Jennifer! It’s time to head for school!”
Dixie
McCall shuffled around her kitchen, dressed in her robe and slippers. She’d just gotten out of the shower, but had
no desire to get put on anything other than what she was currently wearing. There was a time not too long in the past
that she would have considered it a sin to be attired this way at nine o’clock
in the morning. She’d always been an
early riser. Even on her days off she
liked to get her household chores and errands done early so she had time left
to pursue her hobbies. Problem was,
none of her hobbies kept her interest for more than five minutes any
longer. She couldn’t even seem to lose
herself in a good book. When she wasn’t
at work all she felt like doing was crying.
Which was stupid, especially since Dixie didn’t know the reason
why. Or, at the very least, was unable
to acknowledge it.
The
woman tightened the belt at her waist as she poured herself a cup of
coffee. She’d lost weight in recent
weeks. Not only had she been forced to
alter her uniform pants so they’d stay on her hips, but the weight loss was
showing in her face as well. Her cheeks
had become so drawn and hollow that Kelly Brackett had delicately suggested she
make an appointment with her physician for a complete physical. She’d simply given the man a dark glare,
which told him what she thought of his suggestion, delicate or not.
Dixie
knew Rampart’s emergency room was buzzing with gossip about her. She supposed she deserved every whispered
speculation she’d overheard. After all,
she hadn’t exactly been easy to get along lately. Her nurses ran for cover when they saw her coming. Doctors Early, Brackett, and Morton walked
around with puzzled frowns every time they had an encounter with her, and the
paramedics had stopped lounging around the nurse’s station for fear of what
mood they’d find her in. Dixie hadn’t
seen John Gage other than in quick passing in the ER’s corridors since the day
she chewed him out over the silly things, like whistling and calling her Dix,
that simply made Johnny who he was. Or
at least who he had been. A good and
valued friend.
A
friendship I probably lost because of how I treated him that day.
Dixie wished she knew how to make
things right with Johnny. How to make
things right with everyone she’d hurt these last few weeks by her mood or her
unkind words. Problem was, she didn’t have the desire or the energy. She just wanted to be left alone. Alone like she was right now.
The
sunshine streaming through the kitchen window didn’t chase away Dixie’s blue
mood as it might have at one time. Nor
did she take her morning coffee out to the front porch as had been her habit
ever since she bought this house.
Instead, she headed for the couch and another day filled with television
programs she cared little about, and would pay scant attention to as she sat
and cried.
The
same two women who had occupied the dining room table on the day Saigon fell
sat there now.
“She’s
still so sad, Tess.”
“Yes,
Angel Girl, she is.”
“And
it’s been so long now.”
“Yes,
it has been.”
“Will
she ever get past this? Will she ever be happy again? Feel good about who she is and what she means to those who love
her?”
“That’s
up to her.”
“Up
to her?”
Tess
reached out and patted Monica’s hand.
“There’s
a train leaving its station right now, baby, and that train is gonna change a
lot of lives. It has the power to
change Dixie McCall’s life, too. But
whether it does or not is her choice, not ours.”
“How
can a train change someone’s life?”
“It’s
not the train so much, Angel Girl, as it is the decision Mizz McCall will make
because of that train.”
“Decision?”
“If
she chooses to help, she might be able to save the life of a friend. If she chooses not to help. . .well, only
the good Lord knows what will happen if she chooses not to help. Maybe someone will die who wasn’t supposed
to. Or maybe, if nothing else, he’ll
die alone. Without a friend by his
side.”
Monica
eyed the sobbing woman. “I think she
needs to help, Tess. I think helping
would make Dixie feel good right now.”
“I
think so, too. But ultimately, that
will be up to Mizz McCall.
We don’t have the power to influence
humans regarding the choices they make.”
“I
know,” Monica acknowledged as she listened to Dixie cry. “But sometimes I wish we did, Tess.
Sometimes, when I listen to someone cry as though their heart is breaking, I
wish we did.”
While
Dixie sat on her couch crying, John Gage was busy cleaning Station 51’s
kitchen. Roy walked in after completing
his own assigned chore of mopping the locker room and dorm floors. He crossed
to the counter and poured himself a cup of coffee. Johnny looked up from where he was sweeping underneath the table.
“Hey,
thank Joanne again for supper last night.
It was really good, as always.
Eve enjoyed it a lot.”
“She
did?”
“Yeah. She said it was nice to spend time with a
family. Hers is back in Illinois so she
doesn’t see them very often.”
“Oh. Well, then you’ll have to bring her over
more often.”
“Yeah. I guess.”
Roy
couldn’t tell much from that noncommittal, “I guess.”
“So,
are things. . .serious between you two?”
“Serious?”
“Yeah. You know.
Like. . .serious.”
“Did
Joanne put you up to asking me that?”
“No. Why?”
“It
just sounds like something a woman would want to know.”
“Well,
no, she didn’t put me up to it. I’m
asking because I want to know. But
if it’s none of my business just say so.”
Johnny
simply shrugged as he swept cookie crumbs and fine grains of dirt into the dustpan.
“I
don’t know if it’s serious or not.
Kinda, I guess. But not
really. I mean, we have some things in
common, but. . .I don’t know. She’s a
nice girl. I like her a lot if that’s
what you’re asking.”
“Like her as a friend, or more than a
friend?”
Johnny
carried the dustpan over to the garbage pail and dumped it inside.
“A
little bit of both I suppose.”
Roy
resisted the urge to sigh. In so many
ways Johnny was an open book, but when it came down to just how serious he was
about whichever current woman he was dating, he was harder to get information
out of than a clam. One thing was for certain, he was never without a date if
he wanted one. Roy had yet to figure
out why none of these relationships grew into a lifelong commitment. Before Roy
could pursue the subject further Chet entered the room.
“So,
Gage, has Eve come to her senses and dumped you yet?”
“Hardy,
har, har, Kelly. And no, she hasn’t
dumped me. As a matter of fact we had
dinner at Roy’s house last night.”
Chet
sauntered over to the coffee pot in a way that told Roy he was just now
beginning to bait his hook.
“You
know, Gage, I can’t figure out why a beautiful woman like Eve would date a guy
like you.”
“What’s
so hard to figure out about it?”
“A
model must have pretty high standards.
I find it hard to believe she’d lower herself to your level. Of course, I guess some dames would say
you’re good lookin’, though it’s lost on me as to why. And as far as physique goes, which
undoubtedly is important to a chick like Eve, you’re not exactly Mr. Universe
there, Gage.”
Just
like Roy expected, Johnny was starting to get annoyed. He returned the broom to the closet, then
faced his adversary.
“You
know, Chet, looks aren’t everything.
It’s what’s inside a person that makes them who they are.”
“You
really believe that?”
“Of
course I believe it.”
“With
an ugly mug like yours I guess you’d have to.
But the important thing here is, does Eve believe it?”
“Sure.”
“How
do you know?”
“I
just do,” Johnny said, though in truth he had no idea what Eve believed and
what she didn’t when it came to this subject.
But John Gage himself was basically such a decent, honest, down-to-earth
man, that he couldn’t fathom someone only caring for another person because of
their looks. Yes, he knew you could
initially be attracted to someone because of their features. He would never deny that he had an eye for
pretty women. But he wasn’t so foolish
as to think a relationship could be built around something that shallow.
Chet
laughed at his co-worker’s naiveté.
This was the great thing about Gage.
He was so easy to get riled up.
“Gage,
you don’t know jack shit. If something
happened to you tomorrow, like if you got hit by a Mac truck meaning you’d be
even uglier than you are now, that girl would drop you like a hot potato.”
“Chet,
you’re full of--”
Before
Johnny could finish his sentence the klaxons sounded long and loud.
“Station
51, Station 14, Station 110, Station 65, Station 87, collision between train
and bus at the Garden Street crossing.
Train/bus collision at the Garden Street crossing. Time out, nine twenty-two.”
Images
of crunched metal and twisted bodies assaulted Roy’s mind as he and Johnny
raced for the squad. He was glad he’d
eaten breakfast at home that morning with the kids and Joanne, rather than just
grabbing a doughnut at the station.
Based on what dispatch had just announced, Roy had a feeling it would be
a long time until lunch, and when his next meal came he wouldn’t be interested
in eating it anyway.
Shannon
heard the distant blowing of a train whistle, but paid little attention to
it. It wasn’t until that blowing got
louder, and more insistent, that he brought himself out of his reverie. The young man turned to his left. A massive silver Amtrak engine was bearing
down on them. The bus was filled with
shouts as Shannon’s fellow Marines tried to warn the driver.
“Hit
the gas, man!”
“Get
us the hell outta here!”
“Move
it, move it, move it!”
Panic
ensued as men vaulted over one another in an effort to flee the
inevitable. Shannon could feel the
vibrations of the railroad tracks beneath the floor of the bus. Vibrations so hard they caused the moving
bus to rock back and forth. Just when
Shannon was sure his heart would fly out his chest he caught sight of
Andrew. The man was glowing. Glowing like an angel. Andrew smiled at Shannon, and in that moment
the young Marine felt a sense of tranquility wash over him like he’d never
experienced before. His fear was gone,
to be replaced instead by calm acceptance.
Shannon
was sure a bomb exploded when the train slammed into the middle of the bus. As
sparks flew and metal bent, Shannon was catapulted through the air. His last conscious sight was of Andrew, The
Angel Of Death, taking the hands of those who were already destined for Heaven.
John
Gage had been on the scenes of a number of disasters in his seven years with
the Los Angeles County Fire Department, but never had he witnessed an
apocalypse of this magnitude. It was
impossible to tell where the train ended and the bus began. Strips of metal as long as seventy feet were
twisted like pretzels and wound over, under, in, and out of one another. Metal shards and broken glass littered the
area for three quarters of a mile, crunching beneath the firefighters’
boots. Suitcases had been thrown from
the bus’s cargo hold upon impact with the train. They were strewn across the tracks and on the road, many with
their latches broken open. Military
issue socks, T-shirts, and boxer shorts, along with khaki uniforms and hats,
were scattered as far as the eye could see as though someone had just snatched
clean wash from a barracks and left it as a trail for Hansel and Gretel to
follow.
Station
51 was the first to arrive on the scene.
They had to head another mile from Garden crossing because that’s how
far the train had traveled with the bus on its nose before coming to a
stop. As soon as Hank Stanley saw that
it was an Amtrak passenger train that had collided with the bus he put in a
call for six more paramedic units to respond.
Even as he directed Marco and Chet to begin hosing down the Greyhound’s
gas tank as a precaution against further disaster, Hank spoke into his handie
talkie.
“L.A.,
advise all area hospitals to be on Disaster Alert. Repeat; all hospitals should be on Disaster Alert. This not a drill. We’ll need a triage station set up at the scene with ambulances
and helicopters standing by.”
“10-4,
51. Disaster Alert in progress.”
Johnny
could hear screams coming from both the bus and train. People with everything from superficial cuts
to broken arms were jumping from windows in an effort to free themselves from
the wreckage. This was the type of
disaster every firefighter trained for at regular intervals throughout his
career, but training for the situation and actually being a part of it were two
different things. For one uncertain
moment neither Johnny nor Roy knew where to begin. But that moment of uncertainty was brief, not lasting more than
four seconds before Roy was headed to the train and Johnny to the bus. They were the first paramedics on the
scene. How many injured people they’d
encounter before helping hands were available neither man could guess.
Captain
Stanley took charge of the ‘walking wounded,’ as he was already silently
referring to them. With Mike’s
assistance he steered the mobile injured away from Johnny and Roy, directing
them behind the relative safety of the fire truck. Before Hank or Mike had to put their First Aid skills to use the
paramedics from Station 14 arrived and took over the care of these
patients.
Sirens
wailed and the bellow of air horns sounded as more fire engines and paramedic
units arrived. Hank continued to
direct the operation until he saw the Battalion Chief pull up. He ran over to the man’s car just as Patrick
McConnikee was climbing out. Even the
thirty-year veteran of the department was momentarily stunned by the carnage
before him. His eyes traveled from the rear of the train that was bent in three
different directions like that Slinky toy his granddaughter was so fond of, to
the bus that was still miraculously standing on its wheels, though folded right
in the center like an accordion. The
position of the bus made it look like the train’s hood ornament.
“What
have you got, Hank?” The chief asked
when he could find his voice.
Captain
Stanley started pointing out the locations of various firefighters, shouting so
he could be heard over all the noise.
“Two
of my men are hosing down the bus’s gas tank!
No sign of fire at this time, but I want to take every precaution.”
“Good
idea!”
“I’ve
got 14’s, 110’s, and 65’s hosing down the train.”
The
chief nodded, taking visual assessment of the firefighters in complete turn-out
gear doing just as Hank described.
“The
guys from 87’s are assisting the paramedics with search and rescue!”
“Any
idea how many passengers on the bus or train?”
“Not
on the bus. One of my paramedics. .
.DeSoto, just contacted me. He talked
to the train’s engineer! Including the
crew there’s two hundred and fifty people on the train.”
“Any
idea how many are seriously injured?”
“No. DeSoto said the engineer’s injuries aren’t
life-threatening so he was making his way to the first car in search of those
in need of immediate help.”
The
chief waved a hand at the three sets of tracks before them. “Has all this been shut down?”
“I
contacted dispatch and told them we needed that done immediately.”
The
chief nodded. “I’ll follow up on
it! The last thing we want is for
another train to come barreling through here.”
“No
kidding,” Hank agreed, not even wanting to consider such a catastrophe.
“You’ve
done a good job, Hank!” McConnikee
shouted above the incoming sirens.
“I’ll take over directing operations.
You get back to your men.”
“Thanks,
Chief.” Hank turned to jog toward the
Station 51 engine, but stopped when he thought of one more thing. “I had
dispatch put the hospitals on Disaster Alert.
I’m guessing the triage team will arrive within the next fifteen
minutes.”
McConnikee
waved in acknowledgment. He scouted the
area, finally choosing the spot he thought would be safest, and most efficient,
for the triage set-up. He then reached
into his car and grabbed the mike from its holder. Though he trusted each and every one of his men, he wanted
concrete assurance all railway traffic had been halted.
“L.A.,
this is Chief McConnikee. I want an
official from the railroad at the Garden Street scene as soon as possible.”
“10-4,
Chief.”
The
man leaned back into the car and returned the mike to its holder.
As he watched flames begin to shoot
from a rear compartment of the train, and firefighters move in to douse them,
he had a bad feeling things were going to get worse before they got better.
A
person would think it would be relatively easy to find a way into a bus that’s
been sliced open by a train until they had to try it. Johnny circled the Greyhound three times before he found a way
in that either wasn’t too small, or lined with jagged metal that would cut him
before he managed to squeeze past it.
From
Johnny’s vantage point on the ground he could see just the floor of the bus and
what he assumed had been a section of seats.
He pushed the trauma box, drug box, and bio-phone in ahead of him. This was one of those times when he and Roy
could have used extra of all three pieces of equipment. Roy had entered the train with nothing in
his hands. They had assumed the worst
of the injuries would be found in the bus, so decided Johnny should take the
equipment while Roy offered the train passengers what help he could until more
paramedic units arrived.
Johnny
checked the opening he was going to climb through one last time before hoisting
himself up and in. His turn-out coat
caught on a piece of metal, but he pulled it free without incurring so much as
a small tear.
The
paramedic swallowed hard as he took in the devastation before him. It looked like a bomb had gone off. Bodies were dangling over seats, and over
the railing that separated the driver from the passengers. Five bodies, including that of the driver,
were piled on top of one another in front of the smashed door. Some bodies were
still sitting upright in their crunched seats, while others had been tossed around
the bus’s interior before eventually coming to rest on the floor. Johnny reached out and touched the pulse
point at throats as he carefully traversed the aisle. Moans and groans from various directions indicated life. He bent beside the first man he came to who
had a pulse. The victim was unconscious
and bleeding profusely from a piece of metal that had nearly scalped him.
Johnny
looked around as he dug out a pressure bandage for his first victim.
“It’s
gonna be all right,” he said to whomever could hear him. “I’m a paramedic with
the fire department. More units are
responding to the scene right now.
We’re going to transport the most seriously injured first.”
Johnny
heard a smattering of weak, “Okay’s” from all round him. It was then that he noticed everyone on the
bus was male, and all of them were in uniforms representing the United States
Marine Corps.
Helluva
welcome home, fellas.
While Johnny tried to get the bleeding
under control of the Marine he was working on, he glanced up to see a young man
slowly making his way forward.
The Marine was holding his left arm to
his side, limping badly on his right leg, and had blood running down his face
from a gash on his left temple.
“Hey,
sit back down,” Johnny urged, unable to move from his first victim to help this
second one. “Sit down.”
“I
can help you.”
“Yes,
you can. By sitting back down.”
Shannon’s
body gave out on him. He dropped to
what was left of the seat behind Johnny.
“You
just stay right there,” Johnny ordered.
“Where do you hurt?”
“My
left arm. I think. . .I think it’s
broken. My right knee. My head.”
“Did
you lose consciousness?”
“Yeah. I’m pretty sure I did.”
“Okay
then, I don’t want you to move. I need
to help this man first, then I’ll take a look at you.”
“He’s
hurt pretty bad, huh?”
Johnny’s
pressure bandage covered up the fact that the man was missing half his
scalp.
“He’s
got a serious head wound,” was all Johnny would say. “Do you know him?”
“No. He wasn’t in my unit.” Shannon looked around in a dazed manner
Johnny recognized as being a sign of a concussion. “I. . .I a lot of them were,
but I don’t remember their names for some reason.”
“Don’t
worry about that right now. Just
relax.”
Shannon
watched with fascination as Johnny contacted Rampart on the bio-phone, then
started the IV Doctor Early ordered.
“Are
you a medic?”
“A
paramedic, yes.”
“Is
that like a medic?”
“You
mean like an Army medic?”
“Yeah.”
“Very
similar.”
“And
you work. . .work for the fire department?”
“Yes.” Johnny removed his turn-out coat and helmet,
setting them in what was left of a seat.
“I’m a firefighter, too.”
“But
you’re. . .you’re. . .”
Johnny
smiled. “Part Indian?”
“Yeah.”
“So?”
“So,
how’d you get to do this kind of work?”
“Same
way you got to be a Marine. Proved that
I was good at it.”
Shannon
smiled. He liked this man’s
straight-forward style.
“My
name’s Shannon. Shannon Eric Ten
Clouds. Dumb, huh? Irish first name, Danish middle name, and
Indian last name. I’ve always wondered
what my parents were thinking.”
Johnny
smiled in return as he secured the pressure bandage to the head of his
victim. There wasn’t anything else he
could do for the man until an ambulance arrived to transport him. He moved forward, bending and stretching to
feel for pulses. He kept his facial
expression neutral each time he couldn’t detect a pulse, though he doubted he
was fooling Shannon, who was watching his every move. When Johnny finally found a sign of life at a battered man’s
throat he slithered in-between smashed seats in order to give the young Marine
help. He spoke to Shannon while he
worked.
“I’m
John Gage.” The moans and groans of
earlier had given way to eerie silence.
It was nice to have someone to talk to. To know that, amidst this
twisted wreckage, life still existed.
“John Roderick Gage. Not nearly
as interesting as yours.”
“Lucky
you. You probably didn’t get teased as
much.”
“Probably
not. Though I got my share.”
“Yeah,”
Shannon acknowledged of his own mixed race heritage. “I know what you
mean.” Shannon’s eyes traveled over the
bodies of his comrades. “It’s so
unfair.”
“What’s
unfair?” Johnny asked as he took the
blood pressure and respiration rate of his latest victim.
“To
survive ‘Nam, only to have this happen.
A train. A train hit the damn
bus. One minute we’re all sittin’ here
thankful we made it outta that hell hole alive, and then we’re rammed by a
train. Who would have ever believed
it?”
Johnny
didn’t answer the Marine because he had no answer to give him. Shannon was correct. It was unfair. But at the moment Johnny didn’t have time to ponder the workings
of the universe. Including the deceased
driver there were fifty-one men on this bus.
Fifty-one, and Johnny knew for certain thirty were dead. He couldn’t allow himself to dwell on that,
or dwell on the fact that life was far from fair sometimes. Instead, Johnny made a vow that he’d do his
best to get the remaining twenty-one men out alive. It was a vow he had every intention of keeping as he climbed,
crawled, and slithered through twisted wreckage, steadily making his way from
one victim to the next.
Doctor
Kelly Brackett was the head of the Los Angeles County Triage Team. Like the fire department, at regular
intervals the team practiced for disasters that would result in a large number
of victims needing emergency medical care.
And like the fire department, Doctor Brackett was happy that actual
disasters in need of the triage team were few and far between.
Brackett
was in his office when a fire department dispatcher called him about a
collision involving a bus and a train.
He immediately began putting his disaster plan in motion. Rampart’s receptionist had a list of phone
numbers she was to work from in order to notify the other four area hospitals
that needed to be put on alert. The ER
nurse’s station had a list of phone numbers for all off-duty Rampart medical
personnel. Brackett had two nurses
making phone calls while he held a brief meeting with his on-duty staff. He appraised Mike Morton, Joe Early, and
every available ER nurse of what little he knew regarding the accident. He didn’t have to tell these people more
than that. They were well aware of what
their jobs would involve for the next several hours. Those present who were a part of Brackett’s on-site triage team
left the building in groups in order to car pool to the accident scene. Kelly was ready to leave, too, but was
hailed by Betty as he ran by the nurse’s station.
“Just
so you know, Doctor Brackett, I wasn’t able to reach Dixie.”
“No
answer?”
“Uh
huh.”
“Damn,”
the man swore at the thought of being without his best triage nurse. “Here, let me try before I leave.”
Betty
turned the phone around so the doctor could use it from the patient side of the
counter. Kelly dialed Dixie’s number
from memory, then let the telephone ring, and ring, and ring. Twenty rings later he was just about to
disconnect the call when a nasally voice answered on the other end.
“Hello?”
“Dix?”
“Yes.”
“It’s
Kel. Listen, have you seen the news?”
“The
news?”
“On
TV. About the collision between the bus
and the Amtrak train.”
“Oh. Oh that.
Um. . .yes. Yes, I guess I saw
something about it. I. . .I haven’t
been paying much attention to tell you the truth.”
Brackett
cocked a surprised eyebrow. Normally if
Dixie knew of a disaster like this one occurring on her day off, she would have
called into Rampart to see how she could help.
“Listen,
I’m going out to the site with the triage team. I’d like you to meet me there.”
“Oh. Oh. . .well. . .I can’t.”
“You
can’t?”
“No. I’m sick.”
“What’s
wrong?”
“A
bad cold. And the stomach flu I
think. I. . .I’m just not feeling well
at all.”
Brackett
had to admit the woman didn’t sound good, but still, this wasn’t like
Dixie. She loved triage medicine, and
in recent years complained that she was no longer a part of it often enough to
suit her. She normally wouldn’t let
something like a cold keep her from helping if she knew she was needed. But, she was the one who knew best how she
was feeling so there wasn’t much Brackett could do.
“Okay. Well, I’ve got to go. Take care of yourself.”
“I
will.”
“Bye.”
“Bye,
Kel.”
Betty
took the phone receiver from the doctor.
As she began dialing the number of another off-duty nurse she said, “Dixie’s sick?”
“Yeah. Bad cold.
And stomach flu, too.”
“Oh. Maybe that’s what’s been wrong with her
these last few weeks.”
“What?”
“Come
on, Doctor Brackett, don’t give me that innocent look. You know what I mean. Dixie’s been crabbier than a bear who came
out of hibernation before winter ended.
Maybe its the flu that’s been bothering her.”
Brackett
didn’t have time to do more than say, “Could be,” before he left the building at a run, headed for his car in the
doctors’ parking lot. He knew he’d miss
Dixie’s competent presence at the accident scene, and cursed the rotten timing
of her flu virus as he drove.
______________________________
Dixie
hadn’t been lying to Kelly Brackett when she told him she’d paid little
attention to the first breaking news reports about the accident. For all she knew, or cared, it could be
happening in St. Louis, or New York City, or even London for that matter. As soon as she hung up the phone from Kelly
she uncurled herself from a corner of the couch and padded across the living
room carpet. She turned the volume up
on the television and sat in the easy chair to the right of it. A male reporter from channel 10 was at the
scene. Dixie watched as firemen ran
back and forth helping ambulatory patients to waiting paramedics. As the camera panned the area she identified
several fire stations by the numbers on the sides of their trucks, and even saw
the empty Squad 51 sitting off to one side. With as little as she paid
attention to things lately, she’d lost track of which shift was on-duty, so
couldn’t guess which set of 51’s paramedics were at the scene. As the camera panned the wreckage she let
out an involuntary gasp. It was hard to
believe anyone could still be alive inside that bus. She wondered if anyone was, and if so, who was helping them. She had her answer soon enough when she
briefly caught a glimpse of unruly black hair through one of the Greyhound’s
windows. There was no mistaking John
Gage’s lean figure as he climbed over one of the seats with what looked like
the drug box in hand.
The
camera moved away from the bus, to instead concentrate on the train. People sporting splints, thick head wraps
stained with blood, and bandages on every conceivable limb, were being helped
out what few doors the fire department had been able to pry open with the Jaws
Of Life. Dixie saw Roy DeSoto pass a
bloody child out a window into the waiting arms of a paramedic she couldn’t
identify because he was wearing his helmet and had his back to her. It was as
Roy passed out another injured child that Dixie made her decision. It was obvious the fire department was doing
all it could, but they needed help in the form of more trained
professionals. If the paramedics were
tied up treating victims inside the bus and train, then additional medical
personnel had to be available on the scene to aid in the treatment of the
victims once they were freed.
For
the first time in weeks Dixie felt able to take positive action. She clicked off the television and headed
for her bedroom. She was removing her
robe by the time she was in the doorway.
She hung it on a hook in her closet.
She moved to her dresser and yanked opened the top drawer. She grabbed a
pair of white bikini briefs and a bra, then slipped into both before opening
the third drawer. She pulled out a pair
of jeans and a man-tailored blue denim work shirt with long sleeves before
grabbing a pair of thick white socks from another drawer. Though the clothing wasn’t as sturdy as the
firefighters’ turn-out gear, it would offer some protection against jagged
glass and metal. Dixie made quick work
of getting the clothes on, then hurried into the master bathroom where she
brushed her teeth, then ran a comb through her still damp hair. She pulled her shoulder length hair into a
single ponytail and secured it with the first thing she grabbed while running
back to bedroom, a black clip-on satin bow.
A little fancy for a train wreck, but she didn’t have time to dig
through her supply of clips and bows to find something else.
The
nurse retrieved the sturdiest shoes she owned from her closet’s floor, a pair
of brown suede ankle-high hiking boots.
She sat on the edge of the bed in order to pull the boots on and lace
them up. She reached for the lower
ledge of her nightstand where she kept her purse. She retrieved her wallet and keys from it, then headed for the
front door. Dixie kept a medical bag in
the trunk of her car that held the most basic equipment from blood pressure
cuff, to stethoscope, to bandages, to aspirin.
Anything else she might need would be available at the scene.
The
woman paused at the coat closet in her foyer.
She hesitated before opening the door and pulling a lightweight jacket
from its hanger. It was seventy degrees
outside. Considering Dixie was already
wearing a long sleeve shirt the jacket wasn’t necessary, but something the
nurse could only describe as an inner sense of urgency was nagging at her to
put the pale pink jacket on.
The
nurse zipped the jacket halfway, locked the door behind her, then trotted down
the front steps. As she climbed in her
red Mustang she realized that, for the first time in weeks, she felt useful.
For
Roy DeSoto, making his way through the train was like winding through a snake’s
belly. Some of the cars still stood upright,
while others were on their sides, while two were upside down. Like Johnny, he bypassed the minor injuries
for now in favor of treating the most critically wounded. Because passengers had been thrown around
the train, and some had already exited it through windows or holes torn in its
metal, people had been separated from their loved ones or traveling
companions. The hysteria that ensued
because a parent couldn’t find his or her child, or because an old man couldn’t
find his wife of sixty years, made the situation that much harder on Roy. He did his best to calm the upset passengers
while assuring everyone they’d get treatment, be evacuated, and be reunited
with their loved ones just as soon as possible.
Roy
breathed an internal sigh of relief when the paramedics from 14’s and 110’s
joined him. He cast a brief glance out
a shattered window to see more paramedic squads pulling up followed by Kelly
Brackett. He knew Brackett’s triage
team of doctors and nurses would be close behind. He also knew this meant the local hospitals had been placed on
Disaster Alert, and that the department had put out a call for all off-duty
fire personnel to come to the scene.
Roy was thankful for that. With
two hundred and fifty people on this train, and most of them injured in some
way, Roy knew they could use all the help they could get.
As
Roy moved on to treat his next victim he wondered how Johnny was doing. Though Roy hadn’t run across a fatality yet,
he had no doubt the bus was filled with them.
He figured Johnny was just as happy to see the additional paramedics,
and triage team arrive, as he was. It was
never easy being the first paramedics to respond to a scene as devastating as
this one. If nothing else, the presence
of their colleagues would lend both Johnny and Roy the moral support they’d
need hours from now, after every victim had been transported to either the
hospital
. .or the morgue.
____________________________________
Johnny
feverishly performed CPR on a young man who looked like he couldn’t possibly be
more than fourteen.
“Come
on, come on,” Johnny urged as he worked.
He finally detected a pulse, then inserted an esophageal airway as
Doctor Early had instructed. When off-duty
paramedic Charlie Dwyer stuck his head in through the same opening his
station-mate had used to enter the bus, Johnny was never so happy to see anyone
in his life.
Charlie
was momentarily stunned by the sight in front of him. Bodies were tossed everywhere, as though Godzilla had picked up
the bus and shaken it. He knew Johnny
had been the sole paramedic in here for the past twenty minutes. He also knew these Marines were lucky John
Gage was one of the first paramedics on the scene. A lesser man, or a rookie, couldn’t have performed all the
medical tasks Johnny had to handle by himself.
There
was no time to trade friendly barbs like Charlie and Johnny normally did.
“What
do you have?” Charlie said as he
carefully made his way up the aisle.
“He
was in full arrest. I’ve got him back,
but we’ve got to get him out of here.”
“Triage
is set up and running.”
“Get
someone over here with a Stokes then.”
Charlie
spoke into his handie talkie, requesting the needed item.
“How
do things look with the train?” Johnny
inquired while he monitored his victim.
“Don’t
ask.”
At
Johnny’s raised eyebrow Charlie said, “A lot of victims. A lot more of them than there are of us
right now. But off-duty guys are
rolling in every minute. That will
help.”
“Yeah,
it will.”
Shannon
watched with fascination as Johnny and Charlie worked. Just like the men Shannon had served with in
the Marine Corps, Johnny and this man he called Charlie, shared an easy
camaraderie that seemed to transcend racial boundaries. It wasn’t something Shannon was used
to. Prior to joining the Marines his
life had been limited to the reservation he’d grown up on. This gave him a whole new outlook on what
the world might hold for him if he chose not to stay in the military. There were actually other possibilities.
Careers to pursue where people didn’t care if your mother was Caucasian and
your father American Indian provided, like Johnny said, you proved yourself to
be the man for the job.
Johnny
hadn’t forgotten about Shannon. Several
times John patted his shoulder and asked, “How are you doing?” or said, “Hang
in there for me, Shannon,” as he passed him.
Though Shannon’s head ached and his arm hurt, he didn’t complain. He knew his fellow Marines needed medical
attention worse than he did.
The
process of treating and evacuating the living from the bus was a slow, arduous
one. Because of the bus’s condition no
other paramedics could fit inside other than the two already present. Johnny wiped sweat from his brow as he moved
onto his next patient.
Twenty-one
alive, and we got six of them out so far.
Fifteen to go. Fifteen to go,
Johnny repeated to himself, ever mindful of the vow he’d made when he first
arrived on what was left of this Greyhound bus.
A large tent had been hastily erected
by off-duty firefighters for the triage team.
Gurneys lined the inside of the tent as make-shift beds, and spilled
beyond the protection of the tent’s roof as well. The area reminded Dixie of the MASH units in Korea as doctors
and nurses bustled back and forth calling out information about the injured and
giving one another instructions. The
medical personnel were dressed in everything from lab coats, to nurse’s
uniforms, fire department uniforms, suits and ties, to a tennis outfit, a pair
of plaid golfing pants complete with cleated golf shoes, to blue jeans and
casual shirts like Dixie was wearing.
The off-duty doctors, nurses, and paramedics had arrived regardless of
what endeavors they’d been pursuing.
Dixie was glad now that she’d joined her colleagues. If nothing else it beat sitting home alone
and crying.
For
a little while Dixie forgot she was the nursing supervisor of an emergency
room. There were no schedules to worry
about, no employees making complaints about crabby doctors or patients, and no
dirty coffee mugs left to wash that the paramedics had used. Instead, there was simply triage nursing,
what Dixie loved and did best. She took
vital signs, started IV’s, splinted broken bones, and was one of Brackett’s
lead team members when it came to deciding in what order patients were to be
transported, and what hospital they were headed to. Within thirty minutes Dixie
had assessed more people than she could count.
She pinned red tags on those who were the most seriously injured and a
must for immediate transportation. Put
green tags on those whose injuries fell into the semi-serious category. And marked the ‘walking wounded’ with white
tags, meaning they could wait until the very end to be transported.
As
Dixie moved from patient to patient she came across a little girl lying on a
gurney crying. The child had already
received medical treatment and was awaiting transport. Her left arm was splinted and her auburn
bangs had been brushed back to instead be replaced by a large white bandage on
her forehead.
“Sweetheart,
don’t cry,” Dixie soothed as she rubbed the child’s shoulder. “You’re going to be fine.”
“I
want. . .I want my mommy.”
“I
know you do, honey.” Dixie looked around.
It was impossible to guess who this little girl’s mother was, if she was
even present.
“Were
you and Mommy traveling together?”
“Uh
huh. On the train. We were coming to California to visit
Grandma and Grandpa.”
“Oh,
that sounds like fun.”
“It
was until the big noise happened and the train turned upside down. Now I don’t
know where my mommy is.”
“What’s
your name, sweetie?”
“Lori. Lori Ann Henderson.”
“Well,
Lori Ann Henderson, you don’t need to worry.
There are a lot of firemen in that train right now helping everyone get
out. I’m sure they’ll find your mommy.”
“That’s
what the man promised.”
“The
man?”
“The
one who put this bandage on my head and carried me out of the train. He was real nice. He said he had a little girl just about my age named Jennifer.”
Dixie
smiled. She knew the child had to be speaking of Roy DeSoto.
“Yes,
he does. And you’re right, he is nice, isn’t he? His name is Roy. And if
he promised he’d find your mommy then he will.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
Dixie
took a pen out of her pocket in order to add information to the index card
someone had pinned to Lori’s blood stained shirt. The child’s name was printed on the card, along with a list of
her injuries and the treatment she’d received.
“What’s
your mommy’s first name, Lori?”
“Marilyn.”
Dixie
printed on the card - Mother - Marilyn Henderson.
“Do
you know your grandparents names?”
“The
one’s I’m coming to visit?”
“Yes.”
“Grandma
and Grandpa Trumel.”
“Do
Grandma and Grandpa have first names?”
“I.
. .I guess. But I don’t know what they
are.”
“Elaine
and Peter,” a voice from behind Dixie
supplied. The nurse turned around.
“Tess?”
“Yes,
Ma’am.”
“What
are you doing here?”
“Juz
helpin’ out, Ma’am.”
“Helping
out how?”
“With
people like Miss Lori. Gettin’ names,
and information, and makin’ sure these little ones are reunited with their
mommies and daddies.”
“Oh,
good idea,” Dixie nodded, assuming this was a new facet of Kelly Brackett’s
triage team she didn’t know had been added.
She had to admit, in the midst of a disaster when medical personnel were
being pulled in one hundred different directions, having someone on hand like
Tess simply to offer comfort and record information was an asset.
Tess
smiled as she looked down at Lori. “Now
I’ll take over here, Mizz McCall, so you’re free to be where you’re needed.”
“Thank
you, Tess.” Dixie gave Lori’s arm a
gentle squeeze. “I have to go help
other people now, Lori. Tess will stay
with you until you go to the hospital.”
“And
my mommy? Will she be at the hospital,
too?”
“She
sure will be, baby,” Tess assured. “As a matter of fact she’s already waiting there
for you, just a wonderin’ and a worrin’ as to where her little girl is.”
Dixie
shot the woman a dark scowl.
“Whatta
you got your nurse’s cap all turned around for like you’re in a lather over
something?” Tess asked.
“Don’t
lie to her like that,” Dixie whispered. “Offering reassurances is fine, but
outright lies can do more harm than good.”
“Mizz
McCall, I don’t cotton to lyin’, nor do I practice it, so don’t you worry your
pretty head over it none. I didn’t lie
to this child. Her mother is waiting
for her at Rampart Hospital.”
Dixie
was about to ask Tess how she knew that for certain when she was called away to
help with five more patients who were being brought from the train by
paramedics. It would be hours later
before the nurse thought to wonder how Tess knew the first names of Lori’s
grandparents, and hours later when she discovered that, as Tess had promised,
Lori’s mother Marilyn had been waiting at Rampart for her.
Eve
Madison sat on the couch in her apartment with her long legs drawn up, painting
her toenails bright red. She dipped the
tiny brush in the bottle she had setting on the end table, then stroked the
polish over her nails as the TV droned in the background. Her roommate, Sarah Freedmont, came out of
the bathroom wearing a blue stain robe and drying her long, sorrel colored hair
with a towel.
“So,
are you seeing Johnny tonight?” Sarah
asked, as she plopped to an easy chair.
“No,
he’s on duty. We’ve got a date for tomorrow night.”
“You’re
really stuck on this guy, huh?”
Eve
shrugged. “I don’t know if I’m stuck on
him, but he’s sure nice to look at. And
quite the gentleman after the guys I’m used to dating. Kind of old fashioned though, and a little
on the dorky side.”
“Dorky?”
Eve
rolled her eyes. “Bowling. On a Saturday night. Puhleeeease.”
“Then
you shouldn’t allow Johnny to believe you enjoy bowling. Or anything else he likes to do that you
don’t.”
Eve
ignored her friend.
“Then
last night, when we were at his partner’s house for dinner. . .”
“Yeah?”
“He
was running around playing with the kids like he was a kid himself.”
“That’s
not such a bad thing. A guy who likes
kids. If you want some of your own, I
mean.”
“Oh,
I do. Someday on down the road. And I’ll have to say that with Johnny’s good
looks, not to mention my own, we’ll make beautiful babies.”
“You
are so hung up on looks. That’s not
everything there is to a man, you know.”
“As
far as I’m concerned it is. Well, that
and a great body. Not that Johnny’s
body is all that hot, but we can work on it.”
“I’m
afraid to ask this question, but how?”
“A
little weight lifting will do the trick.
He’s nice and trim through the waist--”
“Skinny
is more like it.”
“Okay,
skinny. You’re right, he’s scrawny and
I normally like ‘em brawny. But he’s
got a pretty good set of biceps and shoulders from all the lifting he does on
his job. A little more work in that
area and he’ll be perfect.”
Sarah
frowned. Johnny and Eve had met in the
first place because of her. She was a
model, too, and three months ago had fainted under the hot runway lights during
a rehearsal one afternoon. When she
didn’t regain consciousness a call was made to the fire department. It was Johnny and Roy who had answered that
call, and it was Eve who rode to Rampart in the ambulance with Johnny and
Sarah.
“Eve,
no man is perfect. No person is
perfect. Please don’t try to mold
Johnny into someone he’s not. Or
someone he doesn’t want to be.”
“Who?
Me?”
“Don’t
give me that innocent act. Look, you
just turned twenty-two and he’s what. . .thirty?”
“Twenty-eight.
He’ll be twenty-nine in August.”
“That’s
quite an age difference.”
“Oh,
it is not. You make it sound like he’s
sixty.”
“All
I’m saying is, you’re at an age where you still want to have fun with
guys. Be foot loose and fancy
free. While Johnny’s at an age where he
might be looking to make a more serious commitment. Don’t lead him to think you want that commitment if you really
don’t. Don’t lead him to believe you
enjoy doing the same things he does, that the two of you have things in common,
if in fact you don’t. He’s too nice of
a guy to hurt like that.”
“But
he’s so damn cute,” Eve teased her friend with the sole purpose of making her
mad. “And good in bed.”
“Eve--”
“Oh,
don’t scold me like you’re my mother.
He is good in bed. In that area
he’s got a very good body, if you get my drift. And like I said, old fashioned.”
“Old
fashioned how?”
“He
cares about how I feel. You know,
physically. I can’t say I’ve had a lot
of guys worry about that in the past.”
“And
does he know how many guys you’d had in the past?”
Eve
laughed. “Honey, Johnny’s too old fashioned to ever be told how many
guys I’ve had in the past.”
Sarah
shook her head at her friend.
“Just
do me one favor, okay?”
“What’s
that?”
“Just
be honest with Johnny. If this is just a
fling, tell him so.”
“A
fling? Sarah, I already told you that
some day John Gage and I are going to make beautiful babies together. He’s so. . .exotic looking.
His dark eyes, that mass of thick black
hair, the way his skin turns that luscious bronze when he’s been out in the
sun. He’s part American Indian, you
know.”
“Yes,
I know. You’ve told me that about fifty
times. Now let me tell you something.”
“What?”
“If
all you’re going to build a marriage on is Johnny’s good looks, dark eyes, thick
hair, the way he tans, and the desire to have beautiful babies, then you’ll be
starting out on the wrong foot. As a
matter of fact, you’ll be getting yourself into a marriage that will never
last.”
“What
makes you so smart?”
“It’s
not a matter of being smart, it’s a matter of listening to my common sense.”
Eve
stared at her roommate a long moment before dipping her brush back in her nail
polish.
“I
do love him, you know.”
“Maybe
so. But for the right reasons?”
When
Eve refused to answer Sarah, or make eye contact with her, Sarah changed the
subject. She glanced at the TV as she finished drying her hair.
“What’s
this?”
“Oh,
I don’t know. Some news report about a
train wreck on the other side of the city.
You can change the channel. It’s
almost time for that new soap opera I like. . .what’s it called?”
“The
Heart Of The City?”
“Yeah. That’s it.
The guy who plays Trace Cooper. .Kerry London - is a real hunk. I’m going to see if my agent can get me a
date with him.”
“Eve! You’re dating Johnny!”
“I
know that. But it never hurts for a
girl to have more than one fish on the line.”
Sarah
simply shook her head in disgust as she changed the television channel for her
friend.
I
should be the one dating Johnny, Sarah thought, as she watched Eve drool
over the actor playing the role of Trace Cooper. At least I’d treat him better than Eve ever could in her
lifetime. If I wasn’t so involved with David I
might be tempted to see Johnny myself.
I just hope he figures out what Eve’s all about before she has a chance
to hurt him.
Sarah
headed back to the bathroom to dry her hair. She was so disgusted with her best
friend she didn’t want to be in the same room with her.
Ten
to go, ten to go, Johnny told himself as he watched Charlie Dwyer exit the
bus carrying one end of a Stokes. The
other end had been passed out to a paramedic from Station 6. Just ten to go.
The ten men who remained were the least
critically injured, and the ones Johnny had the most hope for of surviving long
term. Thus, the reason why they were
being evacuated last. Like Shannon,
several had now regained consciousness.
The paramedic gave them a lot of credit for their patience. He’d been on this bus well over an hour now,
and though he knew these men were hurting from their broken bones, lacerations,
bumps, bruises, and concussions, none of them said a word about it. They were more concerned for their comrades
than they were for themselves, which Johnny credited in large part to their
military background.
Along with Shannon, two of the men were
even joking with Johnny as they tried to take their minds off the lifeless
bodies that would remain on the bus until everyone else was evacuated.
A
twenty year old named Rich, who was sporting a blond crew cut, held a bandage
Johnny had given him to his forehead.
“You’d have made a helluva field medic,
Johnny. It’s a shame you had to miss
that tropical vacation spot we just came from.”
“So
I hear,” Johnny said with a smile as he splinted the arm of J. Seavers,
according to the patch on his shirt, a nineteen year old black man who informed
Johnny the J stood for James.
“Shannon’s been telling me all about it.”
“Yeah,
while you guys have been snoozin’ Johnny and I have been gettin’ to know one
another.”
“So,
you got ole’ Shannon as a recruit for the fire department yet?” James Seavers asked in his deep, Alabama
drawl.
“Not
yet. But I’m working on it.”
“Now
that would be a doggone shame ifin’ that happens,” James said.
“ ‘Cause I reckon Shannon’s just about
the best Marine there is, after me a’ course.”
“No,
no, that would be after me,” Rich said.
“You
guys are full of shit,” Shannon teased in return, despite his splitting
headache. “There’s no comparison next
to you two. I am the best.”
Johnny
smiled at the lighthearted bickering that had such a familiar ring to it.
“You
guys would all make great firefighters.”
“Why’s
that?” James asked.
“Because
you bicker as badly as we do.”
“Like
a buncha brothers, huh?”
“Just
like that, James.”
“Dat’s
cool. I’m likin’ the thought of the
fire department more and more already.
And I bet they don’t play reveille to get you out of bed, either.”
“Nope,
no reveille,” Johnny agreed as he put the finishing touches on James’ splint
and secured the arm to the young man’s side with wide strips of cloth
bandages. “But the klaxons do sound at
seven every morning to get us up. That
is if we’re not up already and out on a run.”
“Klaxons?” Shannon questioned with genuine interest.
“Basically
an electric horn. It not only wakes us
up, but it goes off when we get summoned on a call. It’s taken the place of the old-fashioned alarm bells. It kind of sounds like a fog horn.”
“Speaking
of horns, am I hearing things or is there a horn blowing somewhere?” Rich asked.
“Only
in your head,” James wisecracked.
“No,
man, I’m serious. It sounds far away,
but it’s like a train horn.”
Johnny
looked out the window. He couldn’t see
anything but fellow firefighters and
the triage team.
“Maybe
it’s the horn from the train that hit us,” Shannon said. “You know, something’s gone haywire with the
electrical system and it’s going off.”
“Must
be,” Rich agreed.
Johnny
didn’t make a response as he moved on to the next patient in need of a splint
on an arm and an ankle. He didn’t hear
a horn, but then his handie talkie, which was clipped to his belt, filtered a
steady stream of chatter upwards between station captains, their men, and
dispatch. In addition to that noise
there was the steady wail of sirens and loud blasts from air horns as fire
trucks and ambulances continued to arrive.
Johnny smiled his reassurance at his patients. He knew that after this long on the bus, not to mention being
surrounded by dead bodies, they had to be getting unnerved.
“We’ll
have you off of here within twenty minutes, guys. It’s just a matter of a couple paramedics being free to help you
out and get you to triage. Charlie was
going to talk to my captain to see who was available.”
“That’s
good,” James nodded, “ ‘cause I really gotta piss. Will they let me piss, Johnny, or are they gonna stick somethin’
up me that I ain’t gonna like to make me do that?”
Johnny
laughed. “They’ll probably stick
something up you you’re not going to like, but speaking from past experience
let me give you a little hint.”
“Yeah?”
“Just
keep raising a fuss and be stubborn about it.
If you are, and you can stand on your own two feet long enough to get
the job done, they’ll probably give in and let you.”
“Let
me piss like a man?”
“Exactly.”
“Hey,
wasn’t there a song like that?” Rich
asked. “Frankie Valli And The Four
Seasons, right? Piss Like A Man?”
“That’s
Walk Like A Man, stupid,” Shannon said.
“Geez, if you guys keep this up Johnny’s gonna wonder what kinda goofs
were defending his country.”
“Don’t
worry about it, Shannon. If anyone
heard me and Chet around the supper table at the station they’d ask what kinda
goofs were protecting their city from fires.”
“Who’s
Chet?”
“I’d
say a buddy of mine, but at any given moment that can change depending on what
he’s done to me.”
“What
he’s done to you?”
“He’s
a bit of a practical joker.”
“Oh,
a wise ass, huh?”
“You
might say that.”
“Well,
Johnny, my man, if you be wantin’ my advice,”
James stopped in mid-sentence.
“What the hell. . .” He looked
at the crumpled bus floor. It was
vibrating beneath his feet. “What the
hell is going on?”
“It’s
a train!” Rich screamed, his eyes wide as he stared out the shattered
windows. “A train is coming!”
Anything
else said was drowned out by the screaming whistle of the oncoming freight
train. All Johnny could do was yell,
“Run! Run!” as he urged his patients toward the hole in the floor at the back
of the bus.
“Run,
dammit! Run!”
The
impact of the train hitting the already mangled bus threw Johnny across the
aisle. The blowing whistle drowned out
the paramedic’s cry of pain. He felt
the left side of his skull impact with something hard and sharp, while
something else that was sharp pierced his right side. Johnny screamed again, then lost consciousness while praying that
his ten patients had somehow made it out alive.