PRECIOUS CARGO
By:
Kenda
When
I Fall In Love, It Will Be Forever
(Prologue)
A
mother cannot possibly be made to feel a pain any harsher, than that which is
inflicted upon her child. It doesn't
matter if that child's a little boy of four, or a grown man of forty, as my son
was that January day in 1990, when one hideous act of violence changed his life
forever.
It
seems as though I spent that entire winter praying. First praying that my youngest would be safely returned to
me. Then, in turn, praying for the
healing of his many injuries. And not
just the injuries of a physical nature, but as well, the injuries that he kept
buried deep within himself. The
emotional wounds that lashed his soul and cut his heart in a way no belt or
knife ever could.
When
it became apparent to me that neither Rick nor I were able to completely offer
A.J. the help he needed to heal his inner turmoil, I did the hardest thing of
all. I prayed that someone else would
be sent to give him the comfort he was so desperately seeking. And someone else was. Janet.
And now, almost five years later, A.J. is
having a hard time understanding why a marriage that had once been so full of
happiness, has ended in failure. With
all the wisdom my seventy years on this earth has afforded me, I smile softly and
assure him he hasn't failed at anything.
That everything happens for a reason, and the important thing to
remember is that there was a good reason why he and Janet came together
in the first place. They both helped
each other mend some terrible inner scars.
They both helped each other through some very difficult times. They both desperately needed one
another.
As
far as this mother is concerned, there's nothing wrong with that.
Chapter
1
Rick
has always accused me of having a sixth sense where he and his brother are
concerned. Of having the ability to
know when Rick's lying to me, no matter how skillful he might be at pulling his
fibs off on anyone else. Or having the
ability to know when A.J.'s charming me to get his way...to no avail, no matter
how successful that charm might work for him with any other woman in his
life. And, of having the ability to
know when one of them is hurting inside, even while that son tries so hard to
hide his pain from me.
I
stood back those early months of 1990, and watched as A.J. did just that. Concealed the anguish he was feeling over
Erika Garcia's murder from both his brother and me. Kept the guilt he was wearing like a scarlet letter covered up as
best he could, in order to keep it hidden from those who loved him.
It's
funny how a little distance, and a little time, will put things into such an
unclouded perspective. What seemed like
nothing but a muddy, murky pond that winter, is now as clean and clear as a
rushing mountain stream. If only I'd
been able to see it then.
I
was well aware that my oldest son was concealing a good deal of guilt of his
own surrounding the Garcia case. I had
attempted to get him to talk about it on several occasions, but my Rick has
never been one to discuss the things that hurt him the most. Even I, his mother, can't change that fact
about him.
Now
I understand completely why my sons weren't able to help each other through
this trying time, and why things ended up as they did in regards to the closing
of their business. It's as simple as
this. They weren't able to help
themselves, so how in the world could they help each other? They were both so lost and adrift. For the first time in their shared lives
together, each was truly alone.
I
suppose this is why when A.J. showed up at my house that day in late April, I
wasn't overly shocked at what he wanted to tell me.
It
was shortly before six o'clock. I was
sitting on the couch watching the evening news when the doorbell rang. I reached for the remote and shut the TV
off.
I
looked through the peephole before opening the door and greeting him with a
hug.
"Hi,
honey. To what do I owe this pleasure
on a Monday evening?"
He
bent and kissed my cheek. "Nothing
special. I just wanted to talk to you
for a minute."
Trying
not to be obvious about it, I studied my youngest as he walked over and pulled
a chair out from the dining room table.
He took off his sport coat, hung it over the back of the chair, and sat
down.
I
had been so worried about him throughout the trial. I cried inside for him those two long weeks he was forced to
relive the three terrible days in January he and Erika were held captive by the
Conquistadores.¢
He'd been so withdrawn and quiet.
I hadn't missed the signs of massive fatigue either, that shadowed his
eyes with dark circles, and seemed to drain his face of all color.
He
looked better now. Still tired, but
better. As if somewhere within this
tragedy that had been thrust upon us, he'd found a new lease on life.
I
teased him as I pulled out a seat and joined him. "You're 'nothing
special' must be pretty serious if we have to do our talking at the dining room
table."
He
smiled back at me. "Well...I
suppose it's somewhat serious, but not in a bad way. Actually, you'll probably be glad to hear it."
"Good,"
I stated brightly. "Your mother's
ready for some news she'll be glad to hear."
The
comment was meant to be taken lightly, but that fact was lost on A.J. His eyes clouded over with unjust
incrimination. "I know you
are," he said softly. "And
you certainly deserve some."
I
reached over and touched his hand.
"Honey, I'm sorry. I didn't
mean anything by that."
He
gave me a little smile of understanding.
"I know you didn't, Mom.
Don't worry about it."
He
seemed to be having a hard time getting started, so I helped him out. "Just what is it you need to talk to me
about, A.J.?"
He
hesitated a full ten seconds before answering.
"I...I've
decided not to be a private investigator any longer."
Of
course, I didn't have to ask what caused him to make such a decision. "I see," I slowly nodded. "So does this mean you're dissolving
your business partnership with your brother as well?"
His
eyes left me and settled on the china cabinet, as if he couldn't look at me
when he said, "Yes...yes it does."
"Does
Rick know?"
He
focused back on my face and nodded.
"Yes. I told him last
Friday."
"What
did he say?"
"He...didn't
really say anything. Only that he'd
stand by whatever decision I had to make."
Now
that surprised me. I thought for
sure Rick would use every tactic available to talk A.J. out of leaving the
business. It only emphasized to me how
guilty my oldest was feeling. Guilty
enough not to give his younger brother any grief whatsoever about decisions
made that were related to the Garcia case.
And I had no doubt that's the only thing this particular decision was
related to.
"Honey...remember
when I told you that a decision such as this can only be made when plenty of
time has passed and you're looking at it from the proper perspective?"
I
was immediately sorry for having brought the memory up of the teenage boy A.J.
accidentally shot in an alley several years earlier while he and Rick were on a
case. Though the boy lived without any
long term ill-effects, A.J.’s, "Yes," was sad and full of regret.
I
reached over and took one of his hands in mine. "It's just...you and your brother have been a big part of
each other's lives for a long time now.
That business has meant the world to you. To both of you. I just
need to make sure this is what you really want."
The
sorrow in his eyes was so plain to see.
"It's what
I want, Mom. I can't deny the business
hasn't been good to me over the years...but it's been hard on me, too. You know that. I won't put myself through another case like...like Erika's
again. I can't, Mom. I just...can't."
I
could hear the tightness in his throat, and his eyes were suddenly too
bright. As if unshed tears were being
held at bay. I let go of his hand and
cupped his cheek. "I know,
sweetheart. I know."
He
bowed his head for a long moment. When
he looked up at me again the despair from seconds earlier was receding.
"I want you
to know the same thing I told Rick - that I've given this a lot of
thought. That it hasn't been a decision
I've made lightly. I'm well aware that
it doesn't just affect me, but that it affects Rick, too. That's what's made it all the more difficult."
"I'm
sure it has," I agreed, knowing how A.J. must have agonized over this
decision that would ultimately force Rick to make some hard decisions of his
own.
"Will
your brother keep the business going by himself?"
He
shook his head. "I don't think
so. As of right now he says he's not
going to. But as far as what he is
going to do, he doesn't know yet. Nor
would I expect him to. I told Rick I'd
remain in the business until he's ready to...start something new."
I
nodded my agreement. I thought that
sounded like a good idea. And I was
glad to hear that Rick didn't want to keep the business going on his own. Often times the job was too dangerous for
two men as far as I was concerned, let alone one. And I'm only speaking of those times I know about it. I shudder at the thought of how many
hazardous situations my sons have found themselves in over the years that they
neglected to mention to me.
"Rick's
resourceful," I stated with pride. "Probably more so than he gives
himself credit for. Given enough time
to ponder all this, I'm sure he'll come up with something he wants to do."
"I'm
sure he will, too," A.J. smiled.
"And I'll help him in any way I can."
"I
know you will," I smiled in return, proud of the strong love that existed
between the two boys I'd raised.
"Speaking of things your brother wants to do, just what are you
planning to do?" I asked. I wasn't too surprised by the answer I
received.
"I'm
headed back to school in June to brush up on my law classes. I'm going to try my hand at that career you
were so mad at me for giving up seventeen years ago."
"Honey,
that's wonderful," I gushed.
"I have a feeling you'll make a terrific attorney."
"I
don't know about that, Mom, but I'm going to give it a shot. I have to admit, the thought of it is rather
exciting, but kind of scary, too."
"Change
is always a little bit of both those things," I agreed. "But I know you'll do
wonderfully."
We
talked about his plans for school, not only for the
summer session, but, as well, for the fall
semester.
When
I had asked every question I could think to ask and then some, I invited him to
stay for dinner.
"If
you're sure it's no trouble."
"Since
when has making dinner for my sons been trouble?"
He
laughed as he rose to follow me into the kitchen. "Just let me give Janet a call. She was expecting me to come by her condo after I left
here."
I
began pulling things out of the refrigerator while A.J. used the kitchen phone
to call Janet.
It
became swiftly apparent from A.J.'s side of the conversation that Janet knew
exactly what he had come over to tell me.
Now that wasn't necessarily wrong, or a bad thing, I just wondered as to
how much influence she'd had over this decision. If any.
It
also became more apparent to me than it previously had been, that the feelings
between the couple were rapidly escalating.
I could hear it in the tenderness of his voice, and the gentle way he
chuckled over something she'd said. I
could hear the concern and love when he told her to be careful driving home in
rush hour traffic. I could hear the
eager anticipation of seeing her later in the evening when he told her he'd
stop by her place after he left mine.
After
A.J. said his goodbyes to Janet he joined me at the sink. I put him to work peeling carrots for a
salad while I washed and shredded lettuce.
"A.J.,"
I said as I studiously went about my task.
"If what I'm about to ask is none of my business, feel free to tell
me. Okay?"
He
looked over at me and smiled with puzzlement.
"Okay...whatever
you say."
I
didn't look up at him, but rather kept shredding lettuce into salad bowls. "Just how serious are things between
you and Janet?"
"Well...I've
always wanted to date a woman who owns a BMW."
I
looked up at him, then gave his arm a little stinging slap with my hand when I
saw his twinkling eyes.
"Oh,
you. You and Rick are just like your
father used to be. I can't get a
straight answer from either one of you."
A.J.
laughed at me, then bent and kissed my cheek in way of apology. This was one time his charm tactics worked.
I
wasn't quite willing to let the subject drop there, however. "So, is it serious?"
He
chuckled at my tenacity, before concentrating on peeling the carrots once
more. "I...yes, it's
serious."
"Serious
enough that you two have talked marriage?"
He
looked at me out of the corner of his eyes.
I think he was taken aback by my perceptiveness. "Yes, we've...we’ve talked about
it."
Because
I'm his mother, and marriage is not to be taken lightly, I felt it was my
obligation to remind him of a few things.
"You and
Janet had your share of challenges the last time you were serious."
"Yes,
we did," he readily acknowledged.
"But that was a long time ago.
We've both got a number of years of experience under our belts when it
comes to serious relationships and what they entail."
"That
you do."
"I
think we both know ourselves...and each other, a lot better than we did all those
years ago in Florida. As well as having
a better idea of what we each want out of life, and whether or not those wants
can mesh easily into a life together."
"That's
good. Those things are important,"
I agreed once again. "And
Rick? Where does Rick fit into this
picture, son?"
He
gave me a sly smile. "If you mean
am I planning on taking him along on my honeymoon, the answer is definitely
no."
I
swatted his arm once again.
"Andrew! You know perfectly
well what I mean. If you and Janet do marry,
she's not only gaining a husband, and a mother-in-law, but she's also gaining a
brother-in-law. A rather...unorthodox
brother-in-law, who also happens to be the oldest son I love very much. A potential brother-in-law she once accused
of being a Peter Pan. You and I both
know not a lot has changed in regards to your brother's personality since that
time."
"I
know. But things have changed between
Rick and Janet over the years. They've
become good friends."
I
nodded, but didn't say what I was thinking.
That sometimes good friends do not good in-laws make.
"I
have no doubt Rick loves her as a friend," A.J. told me. "And will love her as a sister, as
well, if it comes to that. And Janet
loves him too, Mom. She really
does. Like I said, things have changed
since the three of us were in Florida.
To a certain extent we're all different people. The passing years have done each of us some
good."
I
simply nodded my head once again in agreement with what he'd just said, letting
the subject drop there. I walked over
to the refrigerator and pulled out three tomatoes and a cucumber.
"Mom?"
I
looked up into anxious blue eyes.
"Yes,
son?"
"You'll
be happy if there comes a day when I do tell you Janet and I are getting
married...won't you?"
I
didn't want A.J. to think for one second that I wouldn't be overjoyed for him
if he told me such news. Or that there
was some underlying meaning to the conversation we’d just had that I wasn't
revealing to him, because there wasn't.
I had just wanted to make sure that he and Janet had thought things
through.
I
held my arms out to him, encircling the waist that had been too thin ever since
January. "Oh, honey, of course
I'll be happy. As a matter of fact,
I'll be thrilled! I'll even put an
immediate order in for three grandchildren that I can spoil the dickens out
of. No, make that four."
I
felt his chest move with his laughter.
His arms held me snugly to his body.
"I'm glad
you'll be happy. And about those four
grandchildren?"
I
looked up, expecting to see exaggerated mortification on his face. Instead, I was greeted by a big smile of
delight.
"Sounds
darn good to me, Grandma."
I
chuckled right along with him as I hugged him once more.
It's
so good to hear him laugh again, I recall thinking as he held me. After all he's been through he deserves
every ounce of happiness that comes his way.
Thank you, Janet, for making my boy smile again.
Chapter
2
It
was four short weeks later, the Tuesday after Memorial Day weekend, that my
doorbell rang again. This time it was
eight-thirty in the morning. I had just
returned from my daily three mile walk with some other ladies from my
neighborhood and was headed up to shower.
Again
I looked out the peephole, and once again it was A.J. standing on the other
side.
I
opened the door to let him in. "Hi, hon--"
Before
I could finish the greeting he had me up off the ground and twirled me around
the living room.
"A.J.! A.J. have you lost your--"
His
grin went from ear to ear. "She
said yes, Mom. She said yes!"
I
didn't need to ask who had said yes to what.
His smile said it all. I laughed
at him from where I still hung suspended in the air. "And did you think she'd say anything but yes?"
Gently,
I was deposited on my feet. He gave his
shoulders a sheepish little shrug.
"Well...a man never quite knows when he asks a question like
that."
I
reached out and gave him a congratulatory hug.
"She'd have been six ways a fool had she told you no."
He
rolled his eyes in an expression that said, ‘Of course that's what you'd
say. You're my mother.’
I
took his hand and led him over to the couch.
"Have you set a date yet?"
"Yes,"
he nodded. "September 8th."
"Good,"
I stated, already mentally putting the affair together. "That's over a year away. That will give us plenty of time--"
"Mom...Mom,"
A.J. interrupted my musings. "Not
September 8th of next year. September
8th of this year."
"This
year? This year! A.J., that's only three months away!"
He
laughed at the horror in my voice.
"I know it is. But Janet
doesn't want anything big and pretentious.
She wants to keep things small and quiet."
Small
would be hard enough to handle. But
quiet? The Simons? Never.
I
immediately changed my battle plan and began preparing myself for a wedding
that would take place in just three month's time.
"First
we'll have to decide how many people you're going to invite. Then we'll have to talk about who you'd
like to cater it, and what type of food we should--"
A.J.
held up his hands. "Whoa,
Mom. Whoa. I'm staying out of all this.
Janet's coming over here this weekend so you and she can discuss those
things together."
That
sounded fine to me and I told him as much.
I was looking forward to finally having another woman in the family to
plan such affairs with.
"There's
only one request I'd like to make if you don't have any objections," he
stated.
I
looked up at him and smiled. "What
is it, honey?"
"I'd
like for us to be married right here.
In the backyard. It would mean a
lot to me."
Tears
welled up in my eyes. "Oh,
sweetheart, it would mean a lot to me, too."
"Hey,
there," he soothed, while putting an arm around my shoulders. "Don't cry. You aren't supposed to cry."
With
the sleeve of my sweatshirt I wiped at my eyes. "I'm just so happy for you, A.J."
He
pulled me against his chest. "I
know, Mom. I'm happy too."
And
he was. I could hear it in his voice
and see it in his smile. Any qualms I
had about this wedding date being set just a little too quickly after Janet's
divorce I pushed to the back of my mind.
Yes, I'll admit I was somewhat concerned. I had been since early March when I'd seen this relationship
growing more and more serious with each passing day. Concerned that when enough time had gone by for both Janet and
A.J. to get past the individual wounds that were still so raw, they might
discover they weren't right for each other after all. I wasn't sure if a love born of pain and tragedy was a love that
was meant to last. On the other hand, a
love such as that might turn out to be the strongest love of all. Who was I to say?
And
it wasn't like A.J. and Janet were young kids anymore. He'd be forty-one that July, she had turned
thirty-eight in February. I hardly
thought for one minute that either of them had taken this decision lightly. As A.J. had told me in my kitchen a month
earlier, they both had a number of years experience under their belts in
regards to what makes a relationship work.
For
just a brief second I pondered bringing all this up. Pondered asking A.J. outright if the excitement of a new love and
marriage enabled him to better hide from the pain Erika's death had been
drowning him in. But then I looked up
at his face. And in that moment I saw
the eyes shining with joy, and the smile that told me how much he loved
her. I saw in him once again, the spark
of life that had been missing since January.
The spark of life that Rick and I had been unable to help him find, no
matter how hard we tried.
And
in that moment of seeing all those things, I decided any concerns I had were
best left unvoiced. He loved her with
all his heart, just like I knew she loved him.
If that was good enough for them, then it was good enough for me.
The
hard part that morning was when A.J. was forced to tell me he and Janet would
be moving to Seattle right after the wedding.
I didn't expect that, and when it came it was a shock. I knew I'd miss him terribly. He and I had spent so many years together
after his father died and Rick left home, just the two of us, that a special
bond had formed between us that didn't exist between Rick and myself - or at least
not in quite the same way.
This
time the tears I shed weren't tears of joy, but rather tears of sorrow over all
that was rapidly changing. A.J. hugged
me once again, begging me not to cry.
Telling me Seattle wasn't really all that far away, and that we'd see
each other several times a year.
After
being used to seeing him several times a week ever since he and Rick had
returned from Florida ten years earlier, I wanted to say several times a year
wasn't good enough, but I didn't. I
didn't want to make this any harder on him than it already was.
And
again, for a just a moment, I was tempted to ask A.J. if by getting married and
leaving San Diego, he was attempting to run away from the bad things that had
so recently happened to him here. But I
didn't. Though I must admit now I wish
I would have. If nothing else it would
have been fuel for thought.
I
wiped my tears that day and resolved not to focus on the move to Seattle, but
rather to focus on planning a wedding.
Finally, one of my sons was getting married. I have to admit that at this point in time I had no regrets over
the fact that the boys were getting out of the P.I. business. Yes, I was sad that they would no longer be
in business together, that fact being brought home even more so by the
impending move of my youngest.
Nonetheless, I had spent a lot of years blaming their irregular hours,
unorthodox and often dangerous work, as being the cause of my lack of
daughter-in-laws and grandchildren. It
was asking a lot of any woman to sit home alone night after night, and quite
often on weekends, while her husband breaks into an office building, or runs a
scam that could wind him up in a jail cell, all in the name of his career.
A.J.
left at nine-fifteen that day, saying he had to get to the office because Rick
would be wondering where he was. It was
then that I realized he hadn't told Rick about the engagement yet.
I
walked him to the door. "Do you
think your brother will be surprised?"
"Let's
put it this way, Mom," he smiled knowingly. "About as surprised as you were."
"Then
I take it he doesn't know anything about the move yet either?"
His
face darkened a bit with regret.
"No...he doesn't."
I
hugged him. "I doubt if he'll ever
tell you this, A.J., but he'll miss you terribly."
His
arms wrapped around me as his cheek came to rest upon my hair. "I'll miss him too, Mom. It's not going to be easy at first. For as much as Rick can drive me completely
crazy sometimes...well, you know how much he means to me."
I
looked up at him and smiled softly.
"I know, sweetheart. I
know. And you mean the world to him,
too."
"I
just hope..."
He
let that thought trail off there.
"You
just hope what, honey?"
"I
hope he's not so upset that he won't be my best man."
"Oh,
Andrew Jackson Simon, don't you so much as think such a thing. That isn't even a remote possibility."
He
didn't look like he believed me.
"I sure hope you're right."
I
shooed him out the door that day while telling him to get such a silly notion
right out of his head. That even if he
didn't know it, I could assure him that he wouldn't be getting married
without Rick at his side.
The
Camaro wasn't even out of the driveway before I was on the phone to Janet. First we cried, then we laughed. Then we made plans for her to arrive at my
house early Saturday morning to discuss the wedding.
I'd
been waiting for this moment for so long, that when I finally hung up from
Janet I spent the next hour and a half calling four friends and two
sisters-in-law to whom I was especially close.
It was after eleven before I finally got upstairs to shower that
day. When I did, I was amused, and
somewhat embarrassed, to find myself humming, Here Comes The Bride.
Chapter
3
There's
nothing like planning a wedding on only three month's notice to make a summer
seem to end before it even begins. Not
to mention all the other activity that was going on within my family.
It
seemed as though everyone who had ever done business with Simon and Simon
Investigations wanted to give my sons one more job before they closed the
office for good. Every company the boys
did employee background checks for, and every prominent couple they provided security
for at parties, had them working overtime that summer. And that doesn't even begin to cover the
multitude of other jobs that came their way.
It got to be so ridiculous, Rick jokingly commented that they should
have announced they were going out of business three years earlier. Had they done that, he was sure they would
have made a bundle of money by now.
When
it reached the point they were putting in sixty hour work weeks in July, Janet
and I told them they should turn some of their clients down. Neither of my sons would agree to that,
however, feeling a strong obligation to those people who had loyally patronized
them for so many years.
A.J.
started school three nights a week early in June as he had planned. Because of Simon and Simons' full workload,
he had to steal whatever free time he could for homework and studying. Quite often this was done in the cab of
Rick's truck as they drove from one job to another. When he was forced, because of time constraints, to turn in an
important paper stained brown and crinkled to the point it was barely legible,
his professor remarked that this was the first time a forty-year-old student
had handed in such a document to him with the excuse, "My older brother
spilled coffee on it." We all got
a good laugh out of that, and A.J. got an A, so in the end no harm was done.
And
as if we didn't have enough other irons in the fire, Rick bought the Captain
Gully in late May. Every Saturday
in June, and three in July, A.J., Janet and I helped my eldest scrub and polish
and paint. By the time we were done the
Captain Gully stood gleaming proudly in her harbor. If you didn't know it, you would have
thought Rick had bought her brand new.
A.J.
and Janet also had to make time to fly up to Seattle twice that summer. When they went in July it was to spend three
days house hunting. When they went back
in August it was to sign the papers for the purchase of a rambling
ninety-year-old Victorian they had both fallen in love with on first sight.
In-between
all this activity, Janet and I planned a wedding.
As
A.J. had told me, Janet's desire was for a small, quiet affair. I didn't realize how small and quiet until
she announced on that first Saturday we met to discuss it, "I'd like to limit the guest list to
thirty people, Cecilia."
The
look on my face as we sat together at my kitchen table must have conveyed more
than any words could have.
"Is
that going to be a problem?" The
bride-to-be questioned.
"Well...honey...just
on the Simon side alone A.J. has twenty-three cousins. And on my side there are ten. Now not all of them will come, I
suppose. Some of them do live out of
state. But still, I would expect at
least twenty to show up, plus their spouses and children. And then, of course, there are A.J.'s aunts
and uncles. Not to mention old friends
of Jack's and mine like the Krelmans and the Wells, who will be so disappointed
if they aren't invited. And that
doesn't even begin to touch on A.J.'s friends.
Plus people like Carlos and Eva, who are friends of Rick's, but who I'm
sure would also like to attend. And
we've got to remember Abby Marsh and some of the other officers from the
station. I'm sure Town and Temple will
want to drive down for the ceremony, as well.
And don't forget some of the clients the boys have grown close to over
the..."
I
broke off my mental guest list when Janet started laughing. She leaned sideways in her chair, wrapping
her arms around my neck.
"Okay,
okay, you win. You invite whomever you
want to. I guess as long as all those
people fit in your backyard, it doesn't make any difference to me."
I
knew it did make a difference to her, and I greatly appreciated her bowing to
my wishes. I hugged her back. "I'm just so happy for both you and
A.J., honey. So thrilled my son will be
marrying such a beautiful bride, that I want to share the occasion with
everyone we're close to."
She
kissed my cheek as we parted. "I
know you do, Cecilia. And I
understand. I need to remember that,
although this is my second marriage, it's A.J.'s first. You both deserve to share such an occasion
with all the people that mean so much to you."
I
reached for my blue spiral notebook, the brand new one I had scrawled across
the front, A.J. and Janet's Wedding, and began listing names as fast as they
came to mind. Janet didn't have too
many of her own to add, just a few people from the D.A.'s office and three
close girlfriends. Her family guest
list was small as well. Like Janet
herself, Janet's mother had been an only child. Myron was the middle son of three boys. His oldest brother had been killed somewhere in the Pacific
during World War II before he'd had a chance to marry. Myron's younger brother, Chuck, who lived in
Florida with his wife of forty years, had just one child, a daughter a few
months younger than Janet. Colleen,
Janet's cousin, would be her honor attendant, as Rick would be A.J.'s. Janet and Colleen had practically grown up
as sisters, especially after Janet's mother had passed away. Because of the odd hours Myron kept as a
private investigator, Janet's care was often left to her Uncle Chuck and Aunt
Vera. Colleen had been unable to attend
Janet's first wedding, much less be a member of the bridal party, because she
was quite pregnant at the time with her second child. She was pleased Janet asked her to stand up in this wedding, and
promised that her parents, husband, and three children, would all be sitting in
the first row on the bride's side when the ceremony convened.
By
the time the guest list was complete we had two hundred names on it. I gave Janet a sheepish little grin. "Now the next problem is, how in the
world am I going to fit two hundred people in my backyard?"
A.J.
solved that dilemma for us when he stopped by later in the morning to check on
our progress. First he teased me about
how large this small wedding had suddenly become, then asked, "How
many people do you think you can fit out there?"
"I
was guessing that by the time we rented chairs, probably one hundred."
He
thought a moment. "Alright. Then how about if we invite one hundred to
the wedding, and the remainder to just the reception? We can have a buffet-style meal.
People can fill their plates in here, then move about the house and lawn
to find seats."
I
thought that sounded like a good idea and so did Janet. The ceremony was to start at two p.m. I decided we'd state the reception would
begin at three-thirty and run until seven, so as to alleviate seating
problems. It was my hope that with such
a wide span of hours to greet and visit with the bride and groom, our guests
would come and go in random numbers rather than all arriving at the same
time.
I
looked over my handwritten list of names and moaned with distress. "But now how do I decide which hundred
to invite to the reception only?
A.J.
laughed at me again as he headed out the door.
"That's
your problem, ladies. I don't want any
part of it."
It
took three tries on Janet's and my part before we finally managed to decide
which one hundred people we, as well as Rick and A.J., were closest to.
For
as much as I might have ruined my future daughter-in-law's plans for a small
wedding, she had the good grace not to mention it. And also the good grace to give me warm hug that day when she
left, and to tell me how much she loved me.
______________________
As
August came to an end, Rick equated me to General Eisenhower right before the
invasion of Normandy. And, I suppose,
there was some truth to that comparison as I scurried about lining up my
wedding troops.
A.J.
had rented one hundred white chairs to be delivered and set up in my yard the
Saturday morning of the wedding. As
well, he rented ten wrought iron tables to be placed in the driveway that would
seat six, so that the majority of our elderly guests would have a place to sit
and eat their meal.
Janet
and I had decided on a simple buffet of finger sandwiches with a large variety
of hors d'oeuvres, salads, cheeses and crackers, as well as fresh fruits,
vegetables, and dip to make it easy for those who couldn't find seats to stand
and eat.
The
three-tiered wedding cake that had been ordered was to be frosted in white and
decorated with tiny pink frosting hearts.
One layer was made of strawberries and custard, another raspberries and
cream cheese, and the third layer, in deference to Rick's request, would be
chocolate. Janet and A.J. couldn't
figure out why I wouldn't allow them to pick a decoration out for the top of
the cake. It wasn't until their wedding
day that they saw why.
Jack
had sent me a real silver picture frame from France when he was in the
service. The frame was actually two
little frames in the shape of hearts, that joined on hinges in the middle. For years it had sat on my dresser with a
picture of myself as a new bride on one side, and a picture of my young groom
on the other. On the day of my son's
wedding, I replaced those photos with pictures of A.J. and Janet, and carefully
adorned the top of their cake with it.
Janet
didn't want a traditional wedding gown, and as a matter of fact, didn't intend
to wear white at all. But just what she
was going to wear she didn't know. She
and I spent several evenings shopping for the perfect dress. I finally found it in a formal wear store
across town.
Janet
started out by holding up two-piece suits - the kind I normally saw her wear to
work, though admittedly more on the elegant side. If one could think of a suit as elegant, that is.
I
shook my head. "No. You can't be married in a suit, Janet."
She
moved on to a rack of dresses.
Granted, they were designer items, but they looked more like the type of
dress someone would wear to a fancy restaurant or a wedding. And by wearing it to a wedding, I don't mean
the bride.
I
wrinkled my nose in distaste.
"No. That will never
do."
"But,
Cecilia," she said as she held up a pale pink Christian Dior, "this
one's pretty."
"Yes,
it is," I agreed. "But not
for your wedding."
She
reluctantly moved on to the formal ball gowns.
There she began pulling out long dresses in yellow, peach, and green for
my approval.
"No,
none of those will do either," I negated.
"They're just not you."
She
gave an exasperated sigh before returning the dresses to their proper
place. She buried her head in racks of
gowns once more, continuing her quest.
While
she was busy doing that, I did some searching of my own. Within five minutes I'd found it. I'd found the dress that had Janet's name
written all over it.
I
held up the beautiful, hand crafted gown for Janet to see.
I
could tell Janet fell in love with it the minute I showed it to her. "But, Cecilia," she voiced her
regret. "It's a wedding
gown."
True,
it was. And she'd said many times she
didn't want to buy a wedding gown or wear white. But this gown was different.
It didn't look like something a first-time bride in her twenties would
wear. It was devoid of a train and full
skirt and elaborate veil. All the
things Janet said she didn't want in a dress.
Rather, it had a sophisticated air about it. An air that said the bride that wore it was a worldly woman of
finesse and grace. A woman with a
special style all her own. The gown
itself described Janet to a T.
"You're
right, it's a wedding gown," I acknowledged. "But really, Janet, what difference does it make?"
"Well...I'm
just going to feel funny wearing a wedding gown, considering this is my second
marriage."
"Oh
goodness, sweetheart, that's an outdated tradition as far as I'm
concerned." I thrust the dress at
her, urging, "Just try it
on."
She
hesitated a moment longer before a sales lady with a heavy French accent
approached and insisted that Janet, with her height and slim build, would do
the gown great justice.
And
she did. When she stepped out of the
dressing room tears came to my eyes.
The
form-fitting gown was actually in two pieces.
The long satin skirt clung to her narrow hips and slender legs, forcing
her to take abbreviated steps as she walked toward me. The hemline dragged the ground just a tad,
covering her shoes completely. Hundreds
of tiny pearls formed an elaborate design on the skirt that rose from the hem
to her knees. The top was a separate
piece altogether that buttoned up the back, the white elastic fasteners looping
over intricately placed pearls. Just
like the skirt, the all-lace top hugged Janet's slim body, only further
emphasizing the figure that was the envy of many a woman. It tapered to a point in both the front and
the back, laying smoothly over the top of the skirt and ending a couple of
inches below her waist. The lace
sleeves were puffed at the shoulders, then narrowed dramatically and came to a
stop at her wrists. The collar rose up
high on her throat giving the very modern dress a hint of old-fashioned
styling. Above her bust-line material
had been cut away in the shape of a heart.
Just the barest amount of cleavage was showing.
"Oh,
Janet...it's beautiful," I gasped.
"You're absolutely gorgeous."
Janet
studied herself skeptically in the three-way mirror, turning this way and
that. "I do like it,
Cecilia. But I don't know. I hadn't planned on buying an actual wedding
dress. Maybe I should keep looking for
something else"
The
stout little sales lady indignantly negated such a suggestion. "And why would Mademoiselle consider
buying somezing else when zees dress eez zo perfect for Mademoiselle?"
"It
is perfect for you, Janet," I echoed.
"But
it's my second marriage," Janet told the sales lady.
"Oh,
pooh, pooh," the woman dismissed with a wave of her hand. "A more perfect drezz I have yet to
zee on such a lovely woman az yourself.
Deez eez the wedding gown Mademoiselle should have. A more beautiful bride her groom shall never
zee. "
Janet
and I both laughed after the woman was out of earshot. While she studied herself doubtfully in the
mirror once more I put an arm around her shoulders. "Pooh, pooh. A more
beautiful bride her groom shall never zee."
Janet
chuckled at me. "I don't know,
Cecilia." She placed her hands on
her slim hips and swiveled in front of the mirror like a teenager critiquing
her prom dress. "Maybe I should
get A.J. to come and take a look at it."
"You
most certainly will not!" I
declared. "I don't want A.J. to
get so much as a glimpse of you in this dress until he sees you walk
down that aisle." I gave her a
little squeeze. "Oh, honey, he'll be so proud. You'll make him the happiest man on earth."
"Do
you really think so?"
"I
know so. Now I expect you to buy this
dress today before you have second thoughts."
Janet
laughed at me once more and said she could already tell she was fighting a
losing battle. By the time she got it
home and hung it in her closet, any qualms she'd had about wearing a wedding
dress had completely disappeared.
The
next week the general sent her eldest on a shopping expedition for his wedding
outfit. Much like she hadn't wanted a
traditional wedding gown, Janet hadn't wanted the formality of tuxedos for an
afternoon wedding in a backyard. Even
after she did end up buying the wedding dress, she didn't change her mind about
the tuxedo issue. It didn't make any
difference to A.J., so he readily obliged her by going out and purchasing
himself a handsome, light gray double-breasted suit that looked just as good on
him as any tuxedo ever could have.
Rick
had come over to the house the Sunday before the wedding to help me wash
windows.
We
had just finished our big chore, and he was winding up the hose while I
gathered up the buckets and rags.
"Is there
anything else you need me to do, Mom?"
"No,
honey. You've done more than
enough. Thank you."
He
took off his hat and wiped at the sweat on his brow. "Man, this wedding stuff can wear a guy out."
I
smiled my amusement at him while at the same time handing him a cold beer. "Speaking of wedding stuff, you need to
buy yourself a new suit this week."
"Why?"
"For
your brother's wedding, silly."
In-between
swigs of beer he informed me,
"I've already got a suit."
"Yes. I know.
The Rick Simon all-occasion black suit.
The one you wear to weddings, funerals, court appearances, class
reunions, important meetings with clients--"
"Yep. That's the one."
"Well,
you're not wearing it to your brother's wedding. You're buying a new suit."
"Mom!"
"Rick,
I don't want to hear it. A.J. bought
himself a new gray suit. I expect you
to go out and do the same."
He
looked at me as if I'd said he had to purchase a lime green polyester leisure
suit.
"It has to
be gray?"
"Yes,"
I nodded. "That's the color your
brother's wearing."
"We'll
look like the Bobbsey twins," he moaned with disgust.
"Oh,
you will not. You don't have to buy
the same shade of gray as A.J. did. Nor
the same style for that matter. You
don't like double-breasted suits anyway.
Just buy a traditional cut. And
one that fits well. One from a good
quality men's store. Don't even think
of buying one from Surplus Sammy."
"But,
Mom! I always shop at Sammy's."
"This
time you're not going to," I sternly informed him. "Buy yourself a new white dress shirt,
as well."
"What's
wrong with the white shirt I already have?"
"It
starting to fray at the collar. I will
not have you wearing a frayed shirt to A.J.'s wedding."
He
looked down at me, mumbling, "I'm
startin' to think bein' out of town for A.J.'s wedding would be a heck of a lot
easier on my wallet."
I
chose to ignore that remark. "And
buy a pair of gray shoes and socks to go with it. Oh, and a gray belt, too."
"A
gray belt! Who the hell is gonna see my
belt?"
"I
don't know! Someone might. Just do it, Richard."
He
knew there was no use arguing with me.
He reminded me of the eight-year-old he had once been when I forced him
to put on a suit for church each Sunday.
"Oh, all right," he grumbled.
"But
you don't need to buy a tie. I've got
one in the house for you." I led
the way to the patio doors. "Come
with me and I'll give it to you now."
He
followed me in the house mumbling the whole time.
"Geez, I'm
gonna be broke before this wedding's over with, and I'm not even the one who's
gettin' married! I swear I'm gonna take
the cost of the suit outta A.J.'s wedding present
and—“
Before
he could finish the ranting and raving that didn't mean a thing, I returned
with a small bag in my hand. He looked
into it, then wrinkled his nose with distaste when he pulled out a silk tie.
He
held it aloft, studying it. "What
the hell kind of a color is this?"
"It's
called teal. It's a shade of
green."
"I
can see that. Why do I have to wear
this?"
"Because
that's the color of the dress Janet's cousin Colleen will be wearing."
"So?"
"So,
Rick, if you haven't noticed by now, in the majority of weddings the groomsmen
match the color of the bridesmaids dresses in some way or another."
"And
I gotta wear this ugly color in order to do that?"
"Richard,
it's not ugly. And don't you dare say
that in front of Janet. That's the
color she picked out."
He
pulled a small, teal silk handkerchief out of the bag next. "And I suppose you're gonna make me put
this in the breast pocket of that new suit I have to buy?"
"That's
correct."
"And
A.J. has a tie and handkerchief like these, too? The exact same color?"
"Yes. Janet and I bought a set for each one of
you."
"And
what did he say about it?"
"He
doesn't mind. He likes the color."
He
rolled his eyes. "Figures."
He
made one last desperate attempt at arguing with me. "I don't know why I can't just wear my black suit. I'm comfortable in it. It's broken in. If I have to buy a new suit it'll itch me somewhere. I know it will. Not to mention the fact that the damn shoes will pinch my
feet. New shoes always do that to me,
ya' know."
I
hid my smile as I threw the trump card I had been saving on the table. "Well, son, you've got two choices. It's buy a new suit, or you and A.J. rent
tuxedos."
He
looked at me a moment, trying to gage as to how serious that threat was. He must have come to the conclusion that it
was a very serious one.
"Alright,"
he sighed with disgust. "I'll buy
a new suit."
"And
shoes," I reminded as he headed for the door, bag in hand.
"And
shoes. And socks. And a belt.
And a shirt. Hell, I'll even buy
new gray underwear if it will make you happy.
Man, I'm startin' to wish they'd just eloped and sent me a postcard from
Las Vegas."
I
watched from the kitchen door as he climbed in the cab of his truck, a
permanent scowl etched on his features.
"You don't
mean that for one second, Richard Lawrence Simon!" I called.
"You're proud to be standing as your brother's best man next
Saturday and you know it."
If
he thought I didn't see the smile that touched his lips he's wrong. He covered it up by grumbling, "Yeah, well, with the way you and
Janet got me and A.J. dressin' alike, it'll be a wonder if she doesn't marry me
by mistake."
I
laughed at him as he pulled out of the driveway. I shut the door, saying to myself, "Oh, I think Janet would be wise to that mistake long before
the ceremony was over."
Chapter
4
The
sun was just peeking its head up over the horizon when I rose the morning of
the wedding. I opened the curtains at
my bedroom window and listened to a family of birds singing in a nearby
tree. I couldn't help but think of the
old adage, ‘happy is the bride the sun shines on.’
The
bride that was on my mind that morning was still asleep in my guest room. I was touched when Janet asked me if she
could spend the night before her wedding with me. Of course, she was much too mature, as well as having been
married before, for me to need to give her the old-fashioned premarital 'talk'
all mothers gave their soon-to-be married daughters in my day. Nonetheless, we stayed up late pouring over
family photo albums and talking of A.J. as a little boy. She told me, as well, of how much she loved
A.J. Of their hopes and dreams for the
future, and of their excitement over the new home they'd recently purchased in
Seattle.
Myron,
his brother and wife, as well as Colleen and her family, were being housed at
Janet's condo. The lease wasn't up
until October first, so Janet said they might as well get use out of it. Rick was glad to hear that news. One of the threats I'd used against him
whenever I needed something from him in regards to the wedding, such as buying
that gray suit, was to tell him if he didn't behave himself I was going to make
him host Myron and family.
Still
in my nightgown and robe, I slipped on a pair of tennis shoes and walked out
the patio doors onto the dew-covered backyard.
I knew within a few short hours it would be bustling with activity as
men set up chairs and tables, and the florist arrived to add the last of the
decorations.
A.J.
and Janet would be married under my white arched trellis that was at the end of
the cobblestone walkway that led to the garden. Ivy of three different varieties, and Morning Glories of every
color imaginable, grew up and intertwined on that trellis in thick bunches,
making the white painted wood barely discernible.
The
flower garden had once been nothing more but a small patch of color in a far
corner of the lawn. It had grown
considerably larger in the years since I no longer had little boys playing in
my backyard whose footballs and baseballs didn't always respect Mom's
garden. Each year it seemed as though I
took a little more of the lawn away and added a few more flowers. There was nothing I enjoyed more than
getting on my hands and knees and working the soil.
Three
birdbaths had been added to the flower garden over the years, as well. Three birdbaths I'd gotten Rick to give a
thorough cleaning only the day before.
Once again the threat of an extended visit from Myron had my oldest at
my doorstep bright and early with scrub brush and bucket in hand.
I'd
kept the groom busy as well that week.
A.J. washed the patio and its furniture for me on Thursday, and mowed
the grass on Friday. Aside from other wedding duties, I'd spent most of the
week weeding the garden, as well as the many other flower beds that lined the
outside of the house. Somewhere in-between
all that I gave my home a thorough cleaning, attic to basement.
That
morning I surveyed all the hard work that had gone into this backyard wedding
and was pleased with the results. Even
the farthest edge of the lawn was well trimmed and neat. The flower garden and beds were in full
bloom, awash with purples, blues, yellows, reds, whites, pinks, and
greens.
I
also gave a little prayer of thanks that the sky was clear and there was no
call for rain. When Rick had asked us
one day where we were going to hold the wedding in the event of inclement
weather, A.J., Janet, and I all said in unison, "Don't even think such a
thought." If forced to, we could
cram all the guests in my house, but I certainly didn't want to ponder that
possibility, and was now glad to see it wouldn't be a concern.
I
walked back into the kitchen that the caterer would be filling up with food
later in the afternoon. Edie Krelman
and Margaret Wells had come over the previous day to help me hang wedding bells
and white bunting throughout the room.
The boys then moved the table so that the caterer would have room to add
two of her own tables, while still allowing walking space for our guests as
they filled their plates.
I
started the coffee brewing before returning upstairs to shower and make my
bed. I could hear the shower running in
the bathroom down the hall, signaling to me that Janet was up as well.
I
glanced at my bedside clock to see it was eight-thirty when I walked out of my
room, dressed casually in sweatpants and matching shirt. Certainly not the way the mother of the
groom was planning to present herself in only a few short hours.
I
knocked on the closed bedroom door across the hall.
"Janet? Are you coming down for breakfast?"
"In
a few minutes, Cecilia."
"Would
you like me to make us some eggs and bacon?"
"Oh,
heavens no, my stomach won't tolerate eggs and bacon this morning."
I
laughed at the nervous bride.
"Well, you have to eat something, honey. How about cereal and toast?"
"That
will be fine. Just don't go to any
trouble."
As
I reached the bottom step I thought I heard Rick's truck pull up outside the
house. I went on in the kitchen and
began putting out the makings for breakfast, setting a place for Rick as
well. When my eldest didn't appear
inside the house within a few minutes I looked out the kitchen window.
Rick's
truck was parked against the curb. I
saw him walk around to the bed of the vehicle.
He pulled out, and sat on the ground, what looked to be a nine foot long
orange sawhorse, like the ones people use when they want to close off their
streets for block parties. Another
sawhorse followed the first one. I watched
as he walked to one end of my street and firmly set a sawhorse in place.
I
opened the front door and walked halfway down the sidewalk. "Rick? What in the name of Pete are you
doing?"
He
looked up. "Oh, morning,
Mom."
"Good
morning, son. Now I repeat, what in the
world are you doing?"
"Blocking
off the street for the dance."
"What
dance?"
"The
dance for A.J. and Janet's wedding."
I
walked down to his truck.
"Honey...A.J. and Janet aren't having a dance."
His
face split into a big grin of self-satisfaction. "They are now."
"What?"
"See,
a bunch of Carlos's cousins have a band.
I've heard 'em play and they're real good. So I hired 'em to play for the wedding today."
I
was afraid I knew the answer to the next question before I even asked it. "Rick...have you discussed this with your
brother?"
"Nope,"
he said as he reached into the bed of his truck. "It's a surprise.
It's part of my wedding gift to him and Janet."
"Sweetheart...that's
very kind of you, and while I'm sure both A.J. and Janet will appreciate the
thought, Janet did want a quiet wedding.
Remember?"
He
began pulling banners from the truck that said boldly, Congratulations, A.J.
and Janet!
"Sure I
remember. That's why the band won't be
playing until the wedding's over.
They're supposed to start at four o'clock."
I
nodded at the banners he was now attaching kite string to. "And just what are those for?"
"To
hang across each end of the road from the streetlights."
I
thought I'd nip this idea in the bud before it went any further. "Rick, you have to have a city permit
in order to block off a street and have a dance."
He
smiled at me as he reached in his back pocket.
"Yeah, I know. Abby told me
that. I got it right here."
And
sure enough he did. A permit that
allowed my street to be blocked off from seven a.m. until midnight on Saturday,
the 8th of September.
I
looked up and down the block at my quiet neighborhood. I gave it another try at dissuading my
oldest. "But, Rick, I'm sure the
neighbors will complain about the noise and inconvenience."
"Don't
worry about that, Mom," he dismissed.
"I invited them."
"You
what!"
"I
invited ‘em."
"All
of them?"
"Sure."
While
I had invited a few of my neighbors to the ceremony, those I'd known for years
and whose children had grown up with, and been friends of A.J.'s, I certainly
hadn't invited everyone who lived up and down the entire street.
"But,
Rick...I don't even know half these people."
"You
will after today."
I
followed at his heels as he went to get a ladder out of my garage. "Richard Simon, how will I feed forty
extra people, plus I don't know how many band members--"
"Eight."
"What?"
"There's
eight band members...oh, and their wives and kids, of course."
I
picked up where I had left off as I now trailed him back out to the street
where he set the ladder up by a light pole.
"How will I
feed forty extra people, eight band members, and their families? You know perfectly well we ordered just enough
food from the caterer to feed the two hundred guests we originally
invited!"
He
scaled the ladder with one of the banners in his hand, not at all bothered by
my almost hysterical concerns.
"Don't worry about it, Mom.
I got ya' covered. I ordered
eight pans of ravioli, eight pans of mostaccioli, eight pans of lasagna, two
dozen loaves of garlic bread, two barrels of beer, ten cases of pop - 'cause of
the kids an' all, and twelve large pizzas from Mama Maria's. Everything will be here when the reception
starts at three-thirty."
"Pizzas!" I shrieked.
"At your brother's wedding?"
"Sure,
Mom," he smiled down at me.
"It'll be great. Everyone
loves pizza. And hey, look at the
bright side. If we do run out of food,
pizza's always a real easy thing to order more of."
I
scowled up at him, shading my eyes against the morning sun. "And just where are all these people
going to sit? You know what a problem
the seating arrangements have been."
"I
know. That's why I told 'em to bring
their own lawn chairs."
Under
my breath I mumbled, "I hope they don't wear their Bermuda shorts,
too."
"They
won't. I told all of 'em it's a formal
affair."
I
stood out there watching my impetuous eldest as he went about hanging the
banner. Even I, the general of this
wedding, was not going to be able to derail this particular soldier from his
designated battle plan.
Before
I could think of a way to gently break the news to Janet, the upstairs bedroom
window flew open.
The
bride-to-be stuck her head out, observing her soon-to-be brother-in-law hard at
work. She looked down at me. "What's he doing?"
"Janet...honey--"
Any
thoughts I'd had of breaking the news gently were dashed by Rick.
"Oh...hey,
Janet. Beautiful day for your wedding,
isn't it?"
"Rick
Simon, what the hell are you doing?"
"Geez,
Janet, I don't know if you should be using that kind of language on the day
you're gettin' married. It might be a
bad omen or some--"
"Richard
Simon!" Janet screamed. "Just tell me what you're doing!"
"I'm
blocking off the street for the dance.
I hired a band for you and A.J. as part of my wedding gift to you."
"But
I didn't want a band!" She
wailed. "A.J. and I talked about
it and I told him no dance. You were
there! You heard me say that!"
For
the first time Rick looked a bit contrite.
"Well...yeah,
I know. But gee, Janet, what's a
wedding without a dance?"
"And
just what band have you hired, may I ask?"
"Carlos's
cousins."
That's
all Janet needed to hear.
"Carlos's cousins! Oh,
no!" She looked down at me as the
tears started to flow.
"Cecilia! He's turning my
wedding into a carnival!"
The
window was slammed shut as the bride ran to the bathroom to cry.
Rick
looked down from his perch and shrugged.
"Wedding day jitters.
She'll get over it."
Knowing
I wasn't going to get any further with the best man, I went in the house to
calm the bride. I followed the sound of
her sobs to the bathroom.
Knocking
on the door I called, "Janet...honey,
can I come in?"
I
heard the teary hiccupped reply from the other side.
"Ye...ye...ye...ye..yes."
I
walked in the bathroom to find her clad in blue jeans and a T-shirt, sitting on
the closed lid of the toilet. I hugged
her to me.
"Oh,
sweetheart, don't cry. You're still
going to have a beautiful wedding. The
band won't bother anyone. Those that
don't like it can stay in the house and backyard."
Between
her tears she sobbed, "Why does h...h...h...he always ruin ev...ev...ev...everything?"
"Rick?"
"Ye...ye...yes."
I
handed her a box of Kleenex, then sat on the edge of the tub and waited for her
tears to subside.
When
she had calmed down somewhat I reached over and took her hand. "Janet, doing things like this...hiring
this band, is the way Rick tells those he cares about that he loves them. It's hard for him to say it in words,
sweetheart. He doesn't realize he's
doing anything wrong. He's just being
Rick. He thinks he's doing something
that will make you and A.J. happy."
"But
I don't want a band," she wailed again while blowing her nose. "I wanted a quiet, simple wedding. He heard me tell A.J. that months ago!"
"I
know. But you know Rick. He's still that Peter Pan you accused him of
being so many years ago."
That
got a tiny smile out of her.
"And,
Janet..."
I paused there. She looked at me with red-rimmed eyes.
"Yes?"
"You've
known Rick a long time. As long as
you've known A.J. You know what he's
like. You know what you're getting when
you accept him as a brother-in-law. And
most of all, you know how much he loves A.J., and in turn, how much A.J. loves
him. Whether you like it or not, Rick's
part of the package deal you're going to get with this marriage."
"I
know that, Cecilia," she acknowledged while using a tissue to wipe the
corners of her eyes. "And I do
love, Rick. I don't want you to think
for one minute that I don't. It's just
that...well, that sometimes he can really try my soul."
I
laughed. "Honey, sometimes he can
really try my soul, too. He has since
he was two years old." I squeezed
her hand. "But he's a good-hearted person, Janet. And he's been the rock I've leaned on
through more hard times than I'd care to count. He loves A.J. and me with all the love his heart possesses. And he loves you, too. Just keep those things in mind when you're
at your wit's end with him."
Her
eyes took on a bit of a twinkle.
"Is that how you've survived being his mother all these
years?"
"On
some days, dear, yes. That's how I've
survived it."
I
urged her to wash her face with a cold rag.
"Why don't you call A.J. and talk to him for a few minutes. I'm sure he's just as nervous as you are
this morning and would love to hear from you."
She
hugged me. "Thank you. I'll do that."
She
walked into the bedroom to use the phone.
I saw her pass by the front window, pausing for a moment to look down at
Rick. She didn't think I heard her
mutter, "This is exactly why I knew we had to move to Seattle. He'd drive me nuts if we stayed
here."
I
walked away as she picked up the phone to call A.J. As hard as it was for me to pretend I hadn't heard that last
comment, I did just that. Years ago,
when my boys were still small, I promised myself the last thing I'd ever be was
a meddlesome mother-in-law. The kind of
woman a daughter-in-law dreads to see coming for a visit. I wanted to be a friend to my sons' wives,
just as my own mother-in-law had been a friend to me. I had vowed, that just like Jack's mother, I would stay out of my
married children's affairs, never give advice unless asked for it, shower each
and every one of my grandchildren with unconditional love...and warm sugar
cookies, and have equal amounts of affection for each of my daughters-in-law. I wasn't about to break that vow now, only
hours before my youngest married.
And,
to Janet's defense, I couldn't blame her for being upset. A bride's wedding day is nerve racking
enough without having a lively brother-in-law like Rick to deal with. It didn't help that she was still angry with
him over the bachelor party he'd thrown for A.J. on Thursday night.
Myron
and family had flown into San Diego Thursday afternoon. Although A.J. had met Janet's aunt, uncle
and cousin years before in Florida, he didn't know them well by any means, and
had never met Colleen's husband or children.
Janet, her entire family, and A.J. had just sat down to dinner at A.J.'s
dining room table that Thursday evening when the door burst home and in rushed
Rick, Carlos, Jerry Reiner, and Downtown Brown. Over his good-natured protests, the groom-to-be was ‘kidnapped’
and whisked off to Rick's boat leaving Janet there to host the family meal
alone.
The
bash was rather mild as bachelor parties go.
Just a group of twenty men playing cards, eating pizza and drinking
beer. After Janet's experiences with
Allan Cassidy, Rick wasn't foolish enough to go the route of strippers or women
jumping from cakes. Not that A.J. would
have appreciated those things anyway.
Nonetheless,
Janet was more than a little ticked off to say the least. I can't blame her, as this was supposed to
be an evening reserved for her and A.J. to spend time with the Fowler family. But on the other hand, Rick didn't know
they had plans and hadn't purposely set out to spoil Janet's dinner party. The most that can be said of the whole
affair is that it was unintentional poor timing on Rick's part.
Janet,
however, didn't see it quite that way.
Somehow
A.J. managed to calm her down when he was returned to her from that bachelor
party during the wee morning hours on Friday.
Just like he managed to calm her down over the phone in regards to the
unplanned wedding band.
She
looked much better when she appeared at the breakfast table fifteen minutes
after I'd left her upstairs. Her eyes
were no longer red, and at least outwardly, she didn't seem to be angry.
I
turned from where I was pulling cereal boxes out of a cabinet. "Are you okay now, sweetheart?"
She
smiled at me as she reached in the refrigerator for the orange juice. "Yes.
I'm fine."
"What'd
A.J. say about the dance?"
"He
told me not to get upset over it. That
this was our wedding day, and it was going to be just as beautiful as we had
planned. That I wasn't to let anything
spoil it. He also said pretty much the
same thing you did."
"And
that was?"
"That
this is Rick's way of showing his love for us."
I
nodded my head as I joined her at the table.
"A.J. knows his older brother quite well."
Janet
reached for a piece of toast.
"Yes, he does. I also think he's being extra tolerant of any stunt
Rick pulls lately because we're moving away.
He told me he doesn't want Rick's feelings hurt today of all days."
"It's
going to be hard on A.J. for a while, to be so far away from his brother,"
I commented while pouring milk on my cereal.
"Just like the distance is going to be hard on Rick, too. Prepare yourself for a period of adjustment,
honey. You need to keep in mind that
they've been a big part of each other's lives for many years now."
"I
know, Cecilia. And I am keeping that in
mind. I...I don't want you to think
that I forced A.J. into this move. He
wanted to go."
I
swallowed my spoonful of Grapenuts before assuring her, "Never would I believe anyone could
force A.J. to do anything he didn't want to."
She
smiled her gratitude at me before concentrating on her own bowl of cereal.
I
was ashamed at myself for the thoughts I concealed from her.
Though I do
think you conveniently made the move to Seattle part of this marital
arrangement. I have a feeling A.J. knew
that, in order for him to make you his wife, he was going to have to follow you
to Washington. And I think you were
well aware he knew that.
As
I said, I was ashamed of those thoughts, and even more so when Rick appeared in
the kitchen ten minutes later. Janet
was kind to him, as he was to her.
Watching the two of them talk pleasantly and eat together, no one would
have ever known she was so upset by his antics only a half hour earlier.
Maybe
I'm reading more into this than is really there, I thought. Maybe the remark she made upstairs about
having to move away just came from nerves and anger.
In a short amount of time the morning grew
so hectic that the concerns I had over any animosity Janet might harbor toward
Rick were forgotten.
Chapter
5
By
one-thirty that afternoon my home was as chaotic as that Normandy beachfront
General Eisenhower landed his troops on all those years ago. And just like Dwight D. Eisenhower, I was
busy directing traffic.
I
let the caterer and her two assistants in the front door, pointing the way to
the kitchen. I saw the first of the
guests beginning to arrive and stepped out on the porch to give them a
wave. Once back inside the house I
bustled through the kitchen, dodging the caterer bearing a silver tray, and
looked out the patio doors to make sure the ushers were in place. A.J. had asked his cousin and boyhood
friend, Kevin Simon, as well as Downtown Brown, to seat the guests. I nodded with satisfaction when I saw the
two men, dressed in dark suits with boutonnieres pinned to their lapels,
showing Margaret and Michael Wells, and Edie and Bud Krelman, to their
seats.
A
woman who worked with Janet at the D.A.'s office, Kathryn Coogan, was married
to a professional flutist employed by the San Diego Symphony Orchestra. Kathryn herself was an accomplished
violinist. Considering the size our guest
list had grown to, Janet and I had agreed early on that fitting a piano or
organ into my backyard would be next to impossible. Janet decided instead to hire Kathryn and her husband, Ron, to
play the traditional wedding march.
Kathryn wouldn't hear of letting Janet pay for their services, insisting
their performance would be a wedding present for the bride and groom.
I
watched now, as the elegant couple entertained our arriving guests by softly
playing the theme from Love Story.
By the time the wedding began an array of romantic songs had been
performed, from modern, popular tunes, to beautiful pieces composed several
hundred years ago by Mozart, Bach, and Beethoven.
Janet
and Colleen were using my upstairs bedroom and master bath to dress. My sister's daughter, Karen, is a
hairstylist. She was up there with
them doing their hair and makeup.
Colleen's three children, ranging in age from seven to three, were
running up and down the stairs conferring with their mother over this or that
as young children will do. Their dad
was chasing in and out of the house after them, trying to keep them away from
the busy women.
Myron
was playing the role of nervous father-of-the-bride to the hilt. He paced the upstairs hallway, stopping to
talk to Janet through the closed bedroom door on every other turn.
The
nervous groom was pacing the living room floor. Rick was keeping step right along side his brother, while at the
same time attempting to calm him.
As
I walked through the living room one of Colleen's children ran past me on his
way back outside. "Be careful of
the caterers, Brandon!" I
warned. "Don't knock anyone
down."
"I
won't, Mrs. Simon!" I heard called
right before the kitchen door slammed.
I
gave my pacing A.J. a little pat on the back as I passed him and headed up the
stairs. I did the same to Myron when I
encountered him in the hallway. Unlike
A.J., he stopped my progress.
"Cecilia,
can I talk to you before things get too busy here?"
I
turned around and laughed. "Before
things get too busy? Myron, in case you
haven't noticed, things are already busy."
"Yeah,
I guess they are," he agreed in that rough, gravely tone that was his
trademark. "This will only take a
second anyway."
"What
did you need, Myron?"
"I
just wanted to tell you that I'm really happy Janet's marrying A.J. I always thought a lot of him when he worked
for me."
I
smiled. "That's nice of you to
say, Myron."
"I
was disappointed when they broke their engagement all those years ago. I'm glad they got back together. I know he'll never do to her what that no
good, dirty son of a bit--"
"Myron..."
"Gun,"
he quickly amended, "she was married to the first time did to her. A.J.'s a good guy. He'll treat her right."
"Yes,
he will," I agreed. I knew without
a doubt, very few men would take their marriage vows as seriously as my
youngest would. "And I'm glad too,
Myron. Janet's a wonderful woman. After the year they've had, both A.J. and
Janet deserve all the happiness two people can be blessed with."
My
cheek rested against the cloth of his black suit coat when he hugged me. I could smell the sweet fragrance coming
from the white carnation boutonniere that was only inches from my nose.
"They certainly
do, Cecilia. And maybe you and I will
finally be given those grandchildren we both deserve and have been waiting too
long for."
I
laughed, hugging him back. "Well,
I've already put my order in for four with A.J."
He
released me, laughing as well.
"Then with the three I requested from Janet, we should end up with
seven by the time it's all said and done."
I
let him return to his pacing while I knocked on my bedroom door.
"Ladies, can I come in?"
I
opened the door and entered the room upon hearing Janet's, "Yes,
Cecilia. Come in."
"Oh,
Janet..." was all I could say as my eyes filled.
The
bride was sitting in front of my dressing table mirror. She was already in her gown and the white
satin shoes she had bought. Around her
neck hung A.J.'s wedding gift to her. A
14 carat gold chain with diamond pendant.
From her ears hung the diamond earrings he had given her as well. Her long chestnut locks had been swept up on
the back of her head. Thin strands of
hair had been left loose to fall delicately around her neck and shoulders. A large white lace bow was attached to the
center of the bronze mass, its long wide tails trailing down to end below her
waist.
Though
the dress was definitely modern in style, the high collar, puffed sleeves, lace
bow, and the hair piled on top of her head lent a look of days gone by to this
very attractive lady.
I
wiped at my tears. "Sweetheart,
you look just like an old fashioned Victorian bride."
Janet
chuckled at my sentiments. "Cecilia,
I'm not supposed to look like a Victorian bride. I'm supposed to look like a mature woman who's getting married
for the second time."
I
gave her a hug and kiss.
"Nonsense. Every woman
should look like a bride on her wedding day no matter what the
circumstances."
Colleen and Karen wholeheartedly agreed with
me as Karen put the finishing touches on Colleen's hair.
Like
Janet, Colleen was tall and slender.
Her brunette hair was streaked with flecks of summer gold and fell in
thick waves to her bare, lightly freckled shoulders. I had always envied women with hair like hers. Just a few flicks with a brush, a lick of
hair spray, and every strand stays in place for the rest of the day.
Her
teal green dress, the one that matched the tie my grumbling Rick was wearing,
stopped two inches below her knees.
Like Janet's gown, Colleen's off-the-shoulder dress was figure
hugging. But then, they both had the
kind of figures that allow for such dresses.
A wide, white overlay encircled the top of the dress where it started
just above her bust line, lending a dramatic contrast between dark color and
light.
"And,
Colleen, you're a picture of beauty as well," I complimented sincerely.
Janet's
cousin laughed. Her brown eyes danced
as she stood before my full-length mirror critically studying herself. "Thank you for the kind words, Mrs.
Simon. You just don't know how hard I'm
trying to keep my stomach sucked in.
Those three children of mine have ruined the figure that used to look pretty
darn good in a bikini, if I do say so myself."
If
giving birth to her children had ruined Colleen's figure, I certainly couldn't
see any signs of it. Like Janet, she
was a lovely woman.
"Cecilia,
I knew that dress was you the minute I saw it," Janet told me now.
I
looked down at the tea length mother-of-the-groom dress I was wearing. It was a shade lighter than Colleen's, and
had cost me far more than I had intended to spend. When Janet and I found it on one of our shopping trips she insisted
I look no farther, much like I had insisted she look no farther when we found
her wedding gown.
Like
Colleen, I also had shoes dyed to match the color of my dress. Which, by the
way, Rick thought was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard of.
I
looked at my watch to see that it was eight minutes to two. "Are you both just about ready?"
The
bride and matron of honor nodded their heads.
Amid their words of gratitude, Karen scurried past me to take her seat
outside for the ceremony. As she went
by Rick in the living room I faintly heard him tease her about how long it
takes women to get ready for every occasion.
In turn, she teased him right back, telling him that if women had
hairlines like his it wouldn't take them long to get ready at all.
I
gave Janet a final kiss on the cheek.
"The next time I see you I'll be calling you Mrs. Simon."
She
reached for my hand and gave it a squeeze.
"Thank you for everything, Cecilia. But most of all, thank you for the wonderful son you raised who's
going to become my husband today."
We
hugged a long minute before I turned and headed down the stairs.
"Are
they ready?" The jittery Myron
barked as I hurried past him.
"Yes. But don't bring her down until A.J.'s
outside," I cautioned.
Being
the traditionalist I am, at least where weddings are concerned, A.J. had not
been allowed to see Janet at all that day.
One
of Jack's nieces is married to a minister of an all-denominational Christian
church. A.J. had asked Paul to
officiate at the ceremony. As I entered
the living room Paul, all six foot four and three hundred pounds of him, was
walking in the front door.
"It's
four minutes to wedding time, folks," he joked in his deep baritone. "Is everyone ready?"
"Speaking
for the bride, the matron of honor, the bride's father, and the groom's
mother," I said, "we're
ready."
"I'm
ready," Rick acknowledged.
"But I don't know about the groom.
You may have to hold him up, Paul."
A.J.
stopped his pacing long enough to give Rick a dirty look.
Paul
chuckled. "He won't be the first
nervous groom I've done that for."
Paul
reached for A.J.'s arm. "Come on,
A.J. Let's get this show on the
road."
A.J.
cast one last, longing glance up the stairway.
I gave him a little shove from behind.
"Go on with you. You'll see
her soon enough."
"I
know, but--"
Rick
and Paul grabbed each of his arms and propelled him to the door, effectively
cutting off whatever reply he was going to make.
"See
ya' outside, A.J." Rick said as
his brother disappeared from view.
My
eldest walked over to me and held out his arm.
"Ready, Mom?"
I
nodded my head. For some reason my eyes
suddenly welled up with tears.
"Hey,
hey," Rick gently scolded.
"Don't start that already.
Save some for the ceremony."
I
couldn't help but chuckle at his teasing.
"I'm just so happy for your brother, Rick. It's been such a hard year for him. Janet's been his life saver."
Rick
kissed my cheek. "That she has,
Mom. That she has."
I
smiled at him before turning to call up the stairway,
"Rick's
escorting me outside now, Janet!"
"Okay!" Janet called in return. "We'll be waiting in the living room
when he gets back!"
Arm
and arm Rick and I walked out the front door.
We followed the strains of the bridal processional to the backyard. Rick escorted me up the aisle past the
smiling guests - Abby Marsh, there with Joel Lankey, Jerry Reiner and his
girlfriend, Carlos and Eva, Temple and Town, Raj and his family, the Wells, the
Krelmans, and so many more, to my seat in the front row. Once I was settled he turned and hurried
back to the house.
A.J.
was standing by the trellis with Paul.
He walked over to me and bent down to wrap his arms tightly around
me. I smelled the spicy scent of his
cologne as I brought my own arms up to encircle his neck.
"I
love you, Mom," I was told by my soon-to-be married son.
I
wanted to tell him, "I love you too, A.J.," but I was crying so hard
the words wouldn't come. A good portion
of our guests wiped their eyes, too, as they witnessed this poignant scene.
As
Rick and Colleen rounded the corner of the house A.J. released me, once again
taking his place by Paul.
One
of the boys' former clients had been hired to photograph the wedding. He unobtrusively snapped pictures of the
best man and matron of honor as they slowly moved up the aisle in time to the
notes coming from the flute and violin.
For
all Rick's moaning and groaning, he was quite handsome in his medium gray
suit. The teal green ties and
handkerchiefs added just the right splash of color to lend an elegant, formal
appearance to both the best man and groom.
Rick
gave me a little wink as he passed.
Colleen's youngest called loudly, "Hi, Mommy!" causing a ripple of laughter to emanate from
the guests.
Rick
took his place off to the side of A.J.
Colleen stood across from Rick.
The notes floating out of the flute slowly died out, leaving only the
sound of Kathryn's violin. The first
strains of Here Comes The Bride swelled forth. Kathryn pushed and pulled the bow slowly across the instrument,
dramatically holding each note. I don't
think I've ever heard that old traditional song played with more feeling.
All
in attendance stood and turned when Myron and Janet rounded the corner. The bride glided up the aisle amidst audible
gasps. The jaws of several of our male
guests, those who had never met Janet, hung open in unconcealed appreciation of
her beauty.
Janet
held out her hand when she and Myron came abreast of me. We briefly made contact, squeezing each
other's fingers.
With
open rapture, A.J. had watched his bride's every move. He reached up and wiped at the tears that
spilled over to run down his cheeks.
Even Rick's eyes were suspiciously bright.
There
was no mistaking the love glowing from my youngest's face when Janet came to
stand beside him. She smiled softly
with pride as he took her hand. For a
moment, the world contained only the two of them and the enormous love they had
for one another.
Paul
began the service. Within seconds Myron
had given his daughter away in marriage.
Before he turned to take his seat with the rest of his family, Myron
offered his hand to A.J. This was the
only wedding I've ever attended where I've seen the father-of-the-bride and the
groom shake hands during the ceremony.
It was a touching gesture on Myron's part, and only reinforced to me how
much he thought of A.J. Even more so,
because Myron Fowler isn't known for his sensitive side. There would be those who would debate as to
whether or not he even has a sensitive side.
Janet
had yet to notice that off in one corner sat a man behind a small electronic
keyboard. No, we couldn't fit an organ
or a piano in the backyard, but when A.J. told me of the special gift he wanted
to give his bride ,I saw to it we made room for that keyboard and a
microphone.
Through
my many social functions I knew a retired man by the name of Arthur Franz, who
earned a part-time living singing at everything from weddings, to funerals, to
ball games. He'd been a businessman of
some sort during his younger years, though why he never sang professionally is
beyond me. He certainly had the talent
for it.
A.J.
had heard the man perform on more than one occasion. Unbeknownst to Janet, he hired Art to sing at the wedding.
All
in attendance could clearly read the surprise on Janet's face when the first
notes came forth from the keyboard. She
looked around, finally locating the soloist, then looked at A.J. with
confusion. He offered no explanation
except a loving smile.
I think most of our guests, at least those
over thirty-five, recognized the prelude to the song. After everything Janet had been through with Allan Cassidy, A.J.
couldn't have picked a more appropriate melody with which to declare his love
for his bride.
Art's
voice was as smooth and rich as honey when he started to sing the words to that
old Johnny Mathis tune.
"When I
fall in love, it will be forever.
“Or I'll never
fall in love.
“In a restless
world like this is, love is ended before it's begun.
“And too many
moonlight kisses, seem to cool in the warmth of the sun.
“When I give my
heart, it will be completely.
“Or I'll never
give my heart.
“And the moment
that I can feel that, you feel that way too,
“Is when I'll
fall in love with you."
Of
course, one cannot convey on paper the beauty of the song or the voice that
sang it. Suffice to say that before Art
got to the second verse, Janet was crying.
By the time the ending note faded away her silent tears had changed to
open sobs. Sobs that told all of us how
much A.J.'s gift meant to her.
Paul
had to delay the ceremony until the bride could compose herself. A.J. put his arm around her and pulled her
close, saying something to her none of us could hear. Whatever it was caused her to chuckle a little in-between her
tears. Within just a few moments after
that Janet nodded to Paul that she was ready for him to begin.
It
was my turn to sob openly when we came to the part of the ceremony where Paul
asked, "Do you, Andrew Jackson Simon, take this woman to be your lawfully
wedded wife?"
A.J.
smiled softly at his bride. "I
do."
"And
do you, Janet Madison Fowler, take this man to be your lawfully wedded
husband?"
Tears
streamed down Janet's cheeks as she looked up into A.J.'s face.
"I
do."
Paul
looked to Rick. "The ring
please."
Rick
solemnly pulled the gold wedding band A.J. had handed him just an hour earlier
from his pocket.
Paul
took it from him, then in turn handed it to A.J. When the ring had been placed on Janet's finger and the
appropriate words exchanged, the process was repeated. Paul retrieved a wedding band that matched
Janet's from Colleen. The bride placed
it on her groom's finger as the appropriate words were exchanged once again.
"By
the power vested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife. A.J., you may kiss your bride."
A.J.
gently took Janet in his arms. He
kissed her, then kissed her again, then kissed her a third time. When my youngest didn't show any intention
of releasing his bride, Rick gave those of us in the audience a helpless shrug
and comedic look while tapping his brother on the shoulder.
"Uh...hey
there, fella'. I think you two better
hold off on startin' the honeymoon until tonight."
We
all laughed as A.J., still locked in an embrace of passion, didn't do anymore
than bring one hand around to swat at Rick like one would a pesky fly.
When
the bride and groom did finally part for good Paul announced with amusement,
"After all that, I don't think I have to present the new husband and wife
to you. But, just in case any of you
still do have doubts as to who was joined together in holy matrimony this
afternoon, it's with great pleasure that I present to you, Mr. and Mrs. Andrew
Jackson Simon."
The
violin and flute struck up the lively notes of the recessional, Art joining in
at the keyboard. The majority of our
guests knew the circumstances that had brought the bride and groom
together. Knew what tragic events had
rekindled this strong love and devotion.
Because of those factors, it wasn't restrained clapping that came forth as
the newlyweds walked down the aisle arm and arm, but rather cheers and shouts
of unabashed joy.